[black-roses]

I told my friend a few weeks ago not to tell his mum anything I say because I once made a comment that "I could just take his cat" I was joking but his mum said "No she can't take my cat, I can get her the contact details of who gave it to me but she can't keep him". I was like thinking she didn't need to know what I said I only ment it jokingly. Well anyway, when I was broken into I told him thinking yeah he'll keep the secret safe somehow his mother knew and on the phone she said she was sorry that happened and it was a bad thing. I asked Ben about it he said he didn't tell her and didn't know how she knew. Well anyway, I forgot my wallet at bullcreek station and the day after I found my wallet chucked away in a bush behind Grange medical centre. Anyway, I was shopping with my mum and Ben asked he if could hang. I saw his mum at the P&g bank and she said something about being sorry I lost my wallet and then found it. I confronted Ben about it and asked him why he told her he was gonna deny it but then said he did. I explained that I didn't want anyone to know about my life because they'd judge me and think I was retarded. Well anyway, I'm annoyed about it I feel like I can't tell him anything to him with his mother knowing and I'm just thinking this is a red flag if I can't trust him to keep something I say secret. I asked him why he told her and he said his mum asked about me. Either way I wanted privacy people don't understand people with mental illness everyone would just judge me so I just told Ben knowing he'd understand but now I'm annoyed and I'm not even sure if I'm justified being annoyed. What do you think what would you do?

[RoxanneToto]

No, I’d definitely feel annoyed in your circumstances. You asked him not to say anything, he broke his promise. You’re justified in feeling annoyed by that. It’s understandable you worry about being judged for having mental health issues, but unfortunately you can’t control what other people think.
His mum either misinterpreted what you said, or he relayed it to sound like you’d meant it. Either way, it is super annoying when people take jokes seriously, though I can understand why she might have.
To answer the question of what I’d do, I’d probably try and make this friendship more casual, if I really wanted to hold onto it. I don’t think his mum has really done anything wrong, but it would bother me that she knew things I told my friend to keep quiet about.

[black-roses]

She's always polite to me but I still have that fear of being judged so now Ill just limit what I tell Ben and not talk about my personal life anymore.

[RoxanneToto]

That sounds like a good idea

[Bill3]

You are justified in feeling annoyed. I'm really sorry that you have had to deal with that.

[Rive.]

He keeps showing you (via his actions) that he is not trustworthy. Now, the ball is in your court. It's up to you whether you share anything with him knowing there is a high probability that he will blab to others.

[MickeyCheeky]

So Sorry for what is going on also! Please Do not give up! Hugs. i am afraid i must agree with the other wise and wonderful posters about not sharing that much with him if he keeps doing it. i think i can understand you getting annoyed so i don't think you're doing much wrong by keeping certain things by yourself. Either that or make him understand that you can't share things with him unless he stops oversharing. Sorry if that seems harsh but not many other solutions come to mind at least at the moment. i Hope things will improve really soon for everyone regardless of the decision. Please Do update us if possible if you want to. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @black-roses, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

[black-roses]

I decided yesterday to write him a text saying that I needed time away from him because I was stressed with him and Jack. So I'm taking a few weeks off and then will finally cut him off for good in 4weeks.

[black-roses]

I feel most irritated about the fact that when I confronted him about it he wasn't apologic and when I asked him why he said his mum asked. I'm like thinking this person is weak willed and I can't rely on them to keep my secrets.