Am I being abused?

Oh honey, yes, indeed, you are being severely abused. Staying for the kids' sake is a big mistake. As others above have said, it will cause worse damage to your children if you stay. Children typically model their parents' relationship and behaviors because that's all they know and learn. Just as important, you are being abused and it must stop. It stops by you leaving, and not by staying.

What you need is to build a support system that will help you in making an exit strategy and plan. There are domestic violence centers in your state - research them online, without your husband knowing, and see if you can find one close to you. Call them and ask them for help. Tell them everything that has happened. They will help you to create an exit strategy and safety plan. You may get assigned an abuse advocate who can coach you for as often and for as long as you need assistance.

Whatever you do, do not tell your husband that you are leaving. Plan this secretly, so that violence does not occur. You've got to place your safety and your children's safety above all else.

This will continue happening and will not stop, unless you leave him. It's time to pull the plug. It's not easy and it will be hard, but it's for the best. You will be safe, happier and more at peace in the end.