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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#41
Quote:
I am still pissed that this happened. My problems would have been largely resolved had she been able to move in. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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ArmorPlate108
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,894
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,295 hugs
given |
#42
Could you contact her now and say it was a mistake so she could reconsider?
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#43
Quote:
I informed her that it was a mistake, but she was dubious after my landlord DELAYED getting the application to her for DAYS, and THEN asked for a $250 fee!! He told me there is no urgency, when there WAS urgency and I needed to get the application to her ASAP. What an a-hole..... he seriously f'ed this all up! ARGH!!!!! __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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ArmorPlate108
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#44
I should have just kept the personal loan rather than borrow money from my mother. It's stressing me out far more to borrow from her. And so whatever, I would go deeper into debt with a personal loan with an interest rate of 16%... that's better to me than being stressed about money through my mom.
__________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
Member
Member Since Feb 2023
Location: ireland
Posts: 77
1 36 hugs
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#45
Hey, I am so happy to hear you got away from your obsessed narc hubby and moving on. I don't know what it's like in America but why not just leave your place and move back in with your mam if she has a spare room or something and start looking for a new place, you could find work and save a lot of money in the process or maybe moving in with your boyfriend, would that be an option?. This is what I did five years ago when the landlord kicked me out because he was selling up and then I moved in with my boyfriend but things moved pretty fast then and didn't like it so that didn't work out either. It just could be an option for you if you were desperate that's all.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,894
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,295 hugs
given |
#46
Hope signed new lease for a year so moving with mom would mean owing ton of money to a landlord. And she just started dating a guy so moving in with him isn’t a good idea. Not recommendable. Sure people do that but it doesn’t usually end well.
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#47
Quote:
I already talked with mom about living with her and we both agreed it's not the healthiest decision for me. So, right now I won't be living with her. Can't live with Jay either. He's not a boyfriend. I am staying put and am getting a roommate. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,894
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,295 hugs
given |
#48
Quote:
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ArmorPlate108, unaluna
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Have Hope
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Member
Member Since Feb 2023
Location: ireland
Posts: 77
1 36 hugs
given |
#49
Quote:
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Have Hope
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#50
Well, then again, with an interest rate of 16%, I'd be paying it off til death. But yeah, my sanity is important too. What's done is done. It's gone now.
__________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#51
Quote:
Jay and I are taking things slow. I don't know what will happen. He may even move far away. Maybe not, but not sure how serious he would want to become. He's said that he doesn't think he can commit down the road to living with someone. He may not be commitment material. and is just here for now for me. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,894
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,295 hugs
given |
#52
If he says he thinks he can’t commit, then I’d believe it and plan on it not being long term. When they say it up front, they make their intentions known. He’s not commitment material and is up front about it. Nothing wrong with that. Just make sure you don’t get hurt
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Have Hope
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ArmorPlate108, Have Hope
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#53
Quote:
__________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#54
I am FUMING right now.
I had to talk to my husband about our taxes this morning. He insisted on coming by my apartment at 7:30 this morning to sign the tax paperrwork, and I said no., I will come by your office at noon and you can sign it then, as we had agreed upon yesterday. Well, he got me on the phone at 7:15 AM and reamed into me, about everything needing to be on my terms, how I am selfish and self serving, how his brother thinks I am using him, and how he is not happy with me. This is ALL after him telling me just YESTERDAY how much he loves me and cannot live without me, while bawling his eyes out. More abuse! I am SO done with this a-hole. I hate him with every fibre of my entire being..... this morning was a GREAT reminder of ALL the reasons why I left him in the first place. He claims he has changed... he has NOT changed one single bit! All I got this morning was more abuse. So, I've blocked him. I told him off, then blocked him. I will have to see him today to sign the tax paperwork. I will not listen to anything else he has to say, and I am just done talking to him... for good. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
ArmorPlate108, Samicat
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,894
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,295 hugs
given |
#55
Smart going to his office with witnesses. Him wanting to get you alone in your home is yet another ploy
You are using him… that’s rich. |
Have Hope
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#56
Quote:
I did go to his office and he bawled his eyes out to me at the car, begging and pleading for me to give him another chance. I said no. We talked for a bit, but he cannot understand or absorb my perspective at all. I tell him I can't trust him, and he says to me, yes you can trust me... we went around in circles, until finally I just cut him off and said I had to leave. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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ArmorPlate108, Samicat
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,894
(SuperPoster!)
9 1,295 hugs
given |
#57
Quote:
So he says you are using him and you are selfish, but then pleading for you to take him. It makes no sense. None. |
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ArmorPlate108, Have Hope, Molinit, Samicat
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Member
Member Since Mar 2022
Location: In the west
Posts: 448
2 1,167 hugs
given |
#58
Hugs to you. At least you see his actions for what they are. Circular conversations are the worst, especially when you see it happening and you have to find a way to end it- and it rarely ends with any sort of resolution.
It sounds like you handled it well and used good boundaries with him. |
Have Hope
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Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#59
That's abuse for you... he says mean things in one breath, and is crying and pleading with me in the next.
__________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 9,291
(SuperPoster!)
6 3,699 hugs
given |
#60
Quote:
__________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
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Closed Thread |
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