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Joo321
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Member Since Nov 2024
Location: Egypt
Posts: 1
Default Nov 05, 2024 at 03:32 PM
  #1
I know it's the ol' boring question that people saw and probably answered hundreds of times before, but hear me out, I don't mean objectifying women or any hateful accusations, let's not get into that kind of arguing, all I am saying is..
I 23yrs old virgin male literally never even held hands with a girl, in my third world country it's normal that most of the "unmarried" people are virgins, for me, I don't plan on getting married, in fact I decided that I will never do so, but despite that, I want to try sex, I want to try intimacy ( even when it's not allowed nor accepted in my country, religion nor culture) but let's not get into that, and usually girls who do so here in my country are either hoes/prostitutes or so rare (if they aren't hoes), I am still in collage, to be able to find a "virgin friend with benefits" if I got to know a girl and she happens to not be one, after she knows my intentions she can spread bad rumors about me, and trust me these kind of stuff could literally destroy your life and identity, so it's a huge risk. so it's either I get extremely lucky, or I fix the way I am thinking, so if anyone can convince me to stop feeling grossed or disgusted by that, I'll appreciate so...
let me demonstrate what I meant exactly, what exactly makes me feel disgusted, the fact that a girl had someone before me inside her makes me feel disgusted, the fact that she kissed or sucked someone else before me makes me feel disgusted of even kissing her let alone eating her out. it's like my brain think that she carries dicks particles, or the DNA of the guy/s she have been with before whether it's in her mouth or down there.
especially with the new studies suggesting male DNA can still be present in a woman after she's had sex, and the genetic materials from a previous sex partner can stay in her body for some years.
(don't tell me to go to therapy)
(yes this "untouched" rule is more important than emotions and feelings between me and the potential partner)
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Rose76
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Default Yesterday at 08:08 PM
  #2
I suspect that, somewhere along the line, you've been around other males who have a very disturbed, unhealthy attitude toward women . . . and you've internalized it. Maybe it was males in your family . . . maybe boys you hung out with growing up . . . maybe something in the local culture . . . maybe something you read or were exposed to in other media.

Instead of hoping to enter into a loving relationship, you want to find a virgin female you can use for sex. I promise that mindset will set you up for an empty, miserable life.

It's probably not your fault. You're young, inexperienced, and have probably been under some bad influence. Maybe your parents were unhappy with each other.

Some of the richest, most attractive, successful and powerful men in the world have found joy in committing to a women who was previously partnered with another man. That was even true a thousand years ago, when virgin status was highly coveted.

Your main problem isn't having an aversion to sex with a non-virgin. It's a much bigger problem. You want to be able to use someone. This is you wanting a partner you can objectify. Also you may feel very insecure about being with a girl who might compare you with other young men. Your thinking sounds like it might be more expected in a boy about 12 years old. I don't say this to denigrate you as a person, but you've bought into an outlook that deserves to be denigrated. Hopefully, you will outgrow it.

Try talking to mature men who are in satisfying relationships. Ask them to tell you what they've learned about being happy in the company of a woman. Ask them how important virginity in a woman is. Suppose a nice, young, married woman became widowed. Would the men around you consider her of no interest because she was no longer a virgin. Don't widows remarry in your society?

The idea that a non-virgin girl is somehow contaminated and unfit to have relations with is very foolish thinking. Men fall madly in love with non-virgins every day. They sometimes go on to have great sex and real happiness with them. I'm not suggesting you go take up with some low-life female who may carry a real transmissable disease. You won't learn anything about good sex doing that. Great sex is usually requires that two people care for and trust each. If that's not what you're looking for, then you might as well go online and order an inflatable doll and have fun with it.
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