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#1
Feb 16, 2008, 12:15 PM
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Ok, I need your help here. I've been divorced for 15 years. Had a few relationships along the way, never wanted to get "involved" because I didn't want men coming in and out of my children's lives. So, didn't date at all when they were in grade school.
Well, now I'm dipping my toe in the water so to speak and have a date for dinner next Wed. What do I expect? What will he expect, particularly in the way of a kiss goodnight, hug, handshake, high-five -- what??? I'm clueless and need your good advice. Thanks much, Okie
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#2
Feb 16, 2008, 12:29 PM
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well..as yong asn i am..i have 2 things to say (they were not made up by me so maybe worthy
A. Naturally be yourslef B. Don`t have any expectations. |
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#3
Feb 16, 2008, 01:13 PM
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Go with how you feel. If you don't get good vibes from the guy, don't want to pursue the relationship further, then don't do something just to be "nice". Stay as honest with yourself as you can. If you all talk and have a nice time, etc. then go with that, share whatever of yourself you feel comfortable with. Just keep current with yourself instead of any ideas of the way things "should" be.
If you start asking yourself the "shoulds", should I let him kiss me, should I say/do something now, etc. then back up and find your heart again and let it tell you where you are and what you really want to say or do. Notice how he treats himself as well as how he treats you. Does he take time to think before answering your questions about himself? Does he try to tell you how you should feel or what you should say? Does he put himself down in any way? I always found it relaxing when my T was talking because that meant I could "rest" a little bit, didn't have to be on the spot :-) I think "observing" during a date can be restful too, instead of getting ahead of myself and wondering what I should say or do next.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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#4
Feb 22, 2008, 01:09 PM
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How did the date go Okie?
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I've been married for 24 years and have four wonderful children. |
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#5
Feb 28, 2008, 08:48 PM
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I always thought the most polite thing to do was a hug first and that is it. Sometimes things go other ways, but then you know if its just a hug, the situation wont be uncomfortable for either of you.
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Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. R.I.P. Bandit 7-12-08 I love you I miss you. |
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