[Zukana]

ever since last saturday, Ive been crying myself to sleep, wondering if my boyfriend really means what he is saying, because i have had others telling me other wise..
Some history first.
Before we started going out we would talk alot to each other and help each other out, thats what brought us closer, knowing we could trust each other. the first few months where great, inseperable, and it was great, then i started being too clingy. I knew i was but i couldnt stop, yet i tried. I went away for a month to see my dad, and we spoke online everynight just about. Anyways, about a week before i was getting home he became ill, and he wasnt online anymore, i got worried. And i got home as soon as i could. But my mum stopped me going to see him. yet i was worrying about him so much, i didnt want anything to happen to him, when i finally got to see him he was begining to feel better, wasnt as ill as he had been. anyways, about a month after that he became rather distant with me, began snapping at me for the slightest thing. which finally got me to start snapping back. i hated what we had become, he has never once called me up to see how i was, i see him 3 days a week if im lucky,

8 months on now and things are getting worse, But i also love him soo much. I keep telling myself if i lose him i have nothing to live for, i would be dead on the inside. i couldnt get to sleep at nights, because i could only think of how much i loved him. i began being obbsessed, i spoke to some friends and they told me just stop being so obsessive and he will come around, I tried for a week, straining my self.. and that weekend we where great.. but i couldnt keep it up.. Just after the new year my friend showed me the conversation she had had with him, Hes been thinking of dumping me. It was a knife to my heart, I felt like i was taking a panic attack, I was seeing him the next day, And i couldnt stop crying. She told me not to say shed shown me it. So i kept her promise. The next day, I woke up feeling soo sick i did actually vomit once. When i saw him that full day i couldnt eat a thing, he knew something was up with me. Close to the end of the night i was straining tears in my eyes. I new it would come soon. He sat me does and asked me what i would think of a brake , i told him i dont know maby be silent not knowing what to say, I saw it in his face, So i asked him if he wanted a brake.. when he said yes i burst out crying and through my arms around him, I couldnt stop... he told me he still loves me just needs the time to see it, Now im scared of loosing him, Im scared if i lose him ill do something stupid.. he asked for 2 weekends, so thats 3 weeks.. Its not even passed one week yet and im crying myself to sleep.

I just dont know what to do.. Please someone help me out a little?

[I_WMD]

Zukana ,, My first thought is to >>.. next time you two get together , tell him about knowing he is thinking about breaking it off.

Don't need to say how ya know .,,,,,But until you two have a conversation that doesn't leave ya hanging ,, You shall just be in the same place , crying yourself to sleep .

WMD.

Hoping the Best for You ,