[Zen888]

Hello Everyone

I am in an all female program at college with the exception of 2 male students.

The teachers are starting to assign us into groups. And I just learned that one of the ladies in my group for one course enjoys gossiping...etc. I am already tense enough without having to anticipate her gossiping/immature behaviour.

Any suggestions on how to cope with group dynamics so I get a good grade and dont lose my mind in the process?

Zen888

[Lenny]

Always try to bring something to the table.

Be part of the solution,,not the problem.

In time, that is often recognised by folks who place equal value upon progress and those that conflict with that are left behind.

It does take some patience...but that is the nature of things as we wait for a storm to pass...

With Care,

Lenny

[digdug]

I understand your situation and sympathize. But you have to understand that you are already creating problems by labelling this person as a "gossiper". Perhaps you have good reasons for believing that she is (like, perhaps, she gossips all the time), but entering into this situation with this pre-judgment in mind is going to affect how you treat this person, and it will show. And that will only make matters worse.

When you're stuck dealing with people you don't want to be around, sometimes all you can be as positive as possible. I mean, this person may be immature, but you don't know everything about her, right? Perhaps she is like this for reasons you don't know about. It's surprising what secrets people have - things going on or that have gone on in their lives - that explain why they act out.

So maybe try to keep a positive attitude and find common ground. Perhaps you or she will bring up a movie/tv show/band that you both like, and you can bond that way. It doesn't mean you have to be friends, it just means that you can cope with the situation.

Good luck

[skymonk]

Hmmm, I never would have looked at it from digdug's viewpoint but he/she's right. I woulds have gone the *****y route telling her "Judge not lest ye be judged." I hate gossip! I think digdug's suggestion sounds more mature than mine, but then I reacted in anger at the thought of a gossip.