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  #1  
Old Feb 23, 2009, 11:37 PM
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Zloppy Zloppy is offline
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I am 17, and am now going to be in a relationship with my now girlfriend who I have known for 5 years. Since I have never been in a relationship before, I don't know exactly what to do though. I really really like her, and love being around her as much as possible. Since we just started though, I feel weird, not in a bad way. I have this really happy feeling, but its partially covered with something I can't describe. It's like, I want to spend as much time with her as possible, but just the way her and I are, we probably will see each other 2 or maybe 3 times a week since she goes to a different school than me. I can't wait until I see her. It's like having to wait a week with a new Mercedes for you, but you can't drive it for a whole week, but even more of a desire to see her then my simile. much more than that.

But one thing I have been wondering is about kissing. People say to wait a few dates until you know them more. I know she likes me, and I like her, and we have known each other for 5 years. So I don't see anything wrong with like the second date. And maybe like being right next to her and kissing her cheek, and then maybe her lips if she reacts good to the cheek. I am guessing she wants to kiss just as much as I do.

It's like now I am so happy, I can't even express how I feel. I really really like her.

Does anyone have suggestions on how to keep the relationship going for a pretty long time? Maybe like half a year at least.

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  #2  
Old Feb 24, 2009, 12:27 AM
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Safron Safron is offline
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Try not to over think it as this causes unnecessary anxiety. Have a plan about where you are going to take her and perhaps what you might talk about but try to relax and go with the flow. Relationships have a way of just moving along on their own. Go with it and have a good time.
  #3  
Old Feb 24, 2009, 12:59 AM
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prettyjolie prettyjolie is offline
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That's so sweet. Aw, I'm so happy for you!

But.. I think you are overthinking it. Stop planning so much! Yes, plan where you're going to go on dates and things like that, but don't plan when you are going to kiss her. Those sort of things happen on their own. There is no need to plan for them, and that makes them even more special.
Don't worry so much! That's why guys trip or do foolish and funny things on date and embaress themsleves.. because they are so nervous about doing the right thing.
Just take it slow and if the moment feels right, kiss her.
You can break the ice by maybe kissing her on the cheek like you said or on her forehead or something sweet like that. That way, you have physical contact and you'll feel much more comfortable and not so nervous when you do kiss.

To keep the relationship going.. well, I guess make sure you always communicate with each other. Always make sure you guys are on the same page. Make sure that you are always there for her and you support her, which I'm sure you do already. Keep it exciting and try new things together, it'll keep you from getting bored with each other if it's not always the same old thing.

Good luck!
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  #4  
Old Feb 24, 2009, 10:32 AM
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bonaire bonaire is offline
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You remind me of me... I started dating my first girlfriend at 17 also. I was in college (freshman) and met her in November of that year. I had just finished my first quarter in school with a 4.0 after working hard. Met the girl, we hit it off pretty well. I wrote her a letter every day (this is in '81 - no internet). I'm kind of glad we didn't have the internet then or else we would have been chatting every day.

She was 60 miles away - I saw her on weekends - every weekend. I called her alot too and got into trouble with phone bills. My grades suffered immediately, of course.

One big thing to warn you about. If you guys do progress further and start having a sexual relationship - be VERY careful. That happened in my case and she ended up getting pregnant. Her parents pushed her to have an abortion (still hurts me to think about that). That kind of ruined our relationship - we kept dating but that hurdle hurt us quite a bit. A couple years later, things fell apart. I would have loved to have a life with her. I still miss her a little but it's been a very long time and I've moved on with life and all that.

Your first girlfriend is not your wife. Remember that. Give her space. Go on dates, but don't obsess. It can become highly addictive and if you can convince yourself that you don't have to see her of talk to her all the time - you'll be in a healthier state. Have fun - but don't let her control your life, nor you control her. A lot of stories are out there where young bf/gf act in an abusive manner "why didn't you call me?", "why did you talk to him?", "where were you at this time?" Don't act like that. Be gracious with your time together and let her go on the days you don't see her. Your life is important too - so make sure she is a "part" of your life and not your "whole life".

One key point here. Don't worry about kissing, and all that. Women appreciate talking as the #1 path to their heart. If you have good verbal skills - that's probably 90% of the relationship. Work on that first.
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Thanks for this!
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  #5  
Old Feb 24, 2009, 06:08 PM
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Zloppy Zloppy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bonaire View Post
One big thing to warn you about. If you guys do progress further and start having a sexual relationship
As much as I would love that, lol, We won't and I am sure of that. (even though I think it is all human instinct which is why puberty is around 13. haha. Plus I would get in a bunch of trouble if we did.

And thanks everyone for the comments. I see what you mean by the time is right for kissing. I know that I won't know when, but it will just happen. And maybe kiss her cheek first like I said and see how she reacts to that.

But I really like her for her personality as well as her looks. She is so beautiful.

Thanks for the responses, and still reply if you want. I need as much help I can. lol
  #6  
Old Feb 24, 2009, 11:23 PM
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notz notz is offline
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Think of this date like a movie.

When you go to a movie you focus on every word, every scene, right? Even if you wanted to know everything in the movie ahead of time, you really can't. You just have to go see it!

Be attentive, stay in the moment, let it go where it's supposed to go - most important - ENJOY!
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  #7  
Old Feb 25, 2009, 04:12 PM
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Zloppy Zloppy is offline
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Nice comparison

Thanks
  #8  
Old Feb 25, 2009, 09:17 PM
youOme youOme is offline
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First love is awesome, enjoy it. I think it's adorable. As far as kissing goes...go with your feeling and go based on how she is acting. There's nothing wrong with taking time though. I have to say that because I made the mistake of rushing things....numerous times in a lot of the relationships I have encountered. When I look back I wished I'd taken things more slowly and appreciated them more.
  #9  
Old Feb 25, 2009, 10:05 PM
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Zloppy Zloppy is offline
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Yeah, I don't want to rush things. I was just curious, because what if that time is sooner than I expected for that kiss. But anyways, I want our relationship to last as long as possible. Everything is at perfect conditions. She is beautiful, she likes me, as well as I like her, we don't see each other every minute possible, maybe once every few days, so we won't get tired of each other, yet still is often enough. We have known each other 5 years, and so we know a lot about each other already.
  #10  
Old Feb 26, 2009, 07:39 AM
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ihateit ihateit is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zloppy View Post
Yeah, I don't want to rush things. I was just curious, because what if that time is sooner than I expected for that kiss. But anyways, I want our relationship to last as long as possible. Everything is at perfect conditions. She is beautiful, she likes me, as well as I like her, we don't see each other every minute possible, maybe once every few days, so we won't get tired of each other, yet still is often enough. We have known each other 5 years, and so we know a lot about each other already.
My grandmother had a girl living upstairs from her apartment. She was a very nice, very pretty girl. I didn't go to school with her, because I lived in a diff part of town, but I really liked her, yet I was shy. I did talk to her from time to time, but couldn't get anything out really lol, that and we were a bit young, jr high, maybe even 6th grade at the time we met.
So...this was all pre-high school.

By the time high school rolled around, I was a little more sure of myself, and I could tell by the way she looked at me and talked with me she wanted more than friendship. We had "known" each other for about 4 years at this point. I finally asked her out and she said yes! Woot! LOL...

Ok, the point. We went to dinner and a movie. And although my first date with my now wife, is prolly the best date I have ever been on, because it not only led to my marriage, but it was a great date, this one runs a close second. As everyone has said, let it flow, I paid attn to her, I let it run like a movie (that was an awesome analogy btw Notz! ), let things come as they would, didn't push anything and it was awesome. We dated for over a year, as I left to join the USAF, and therein lies another story, if ya wanna hear that PM me hehe.

As for the kiss, yeah, it happened, and it was mutual, we just looked at each other and it happened, so yeah, you'll know!

GL, all the best, treat her right and you won't have to worry about it lasting.

GL and God bless!
  #11  
Old Feb 26, 2009, 06:50 PM
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Zloppy Zloppy is offline
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Thanks. You have a cool story.
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