my sister's unhealthy relationship

I am almost 18 and my sister is 16. We generally have a good relationship, but one thing has always bothered me: her boyfriend. They went to the same middle school but barely knew each other when they started dating in August 2007. From the start, he started lying to my parents. When I brought this up to my sister, she took his side, even though she knew I was right. This was the beginning of the downfall of our relationship.

Over the next year her boyfriend constantly tormented me: calling me names like a "*****" and a "*****" and even hitting me on one occasion when I accidently ran into him. My sister ignored everything he did and continued to date him. My parents also did not do anything about this. In August 2008 her boyfriend moved to Arizona (we live in North Carolina), and my sister has not seen him since. However, they continue to date, even though he makes her upset since they constantly talk on the phone.

I tried to talk to my parents about this, but they just ignore me because I have never liked her boyfriend. They do not believe that I am looking after my sister's interests. My mother has not done anything to help my sister move on with her life (even though she said that she would) and constantly blames me every time me and my sister fight. I do not know what to do anymore. My sister refuses to move on even though she has not seen her boyfriend in seven months. My parents still refuse to listen to me; please help.

hi grndy and welcome to pc!!! it sounds like you love your sister a lot and i know it is worrying you about her and her boyfriend's relationship. it sounds like you've done all you can do. i've found that i cannot change anybody but myself even tho at times that can be frustrating if we love someone and feel they are in a no win situation. so the best suggestion i can give you is to continue to let your sister know how much you love her. perhaps this long distance relationship will fizzle itself out anyway. in the meantime, just know that she will have to make that decision. your parents have chosen to not heed your cautions about this young man. idk but for whatever reason they have. if it were me, i'd just get on with my life and enjoy each day. try not to worry cause it sounds like you've done all that can be done. keep us posted, will u? we care about you and you do matter.