[Ursula]

I have a niece who's an alcoholic with 2 DUI's and married 3 times at 24... so obviously huge issues. For some reason she chooses to shun and ignore me. I had left the family for a few years due to the chaos and dsyfunction but I have recently reconciled. I have tried to talk to her in a friendly and peaceful way yet she continues to be rude and ignore me. The fam just says she's a "bleep"... and that she has the problem. So, should I continue to go to events and just say hello and continue on with the event? To do otherwise would allow her illness, whatever it may be... to control and maniuplate others. Anyone's input?

[magz88]

It's such a shame your family is ignoring her just because she is the so-called "screw up". Every family has someone who isn't totally put together right.

You should try to get the family to sit with her all together - an intervention sort of thing. If they refuse you can always keep trying yourself, get her to see a professional.

Sometimes people just need to learn on their own. I know a couple people who just don't think about how their actions will affect themselves or those around them (DUI, unprotected sex, driving with no insurance). The only way they have learned is by getting a DUI or getting pregnant. Some haven't learned and if they refuse to change then they won't no matter what you do.

I hope she listens to you......she is lucky to have someone like you around I hope you can get through to her!!!