[growlycat]

I had a dream last night about ex t Sparky. In the dream we were both shopping around the holidays and just briefly ran into each other he was passing and just smiled and waved and do did I.

I had such s strong crush on him in real life. Whatever transference that is going on with new t is hard to understand. He is only seven years older than me so he often feels like a male version of me. Or a friend or brother. There are moments when his issues are too close to my parents' issues. Now I'm starting to have wierd thoughts about wanting to be hugged all the time or touched Most of this isn't romantic or sexual but I've had an odd thought creep in once in awhile. I really don't understand what it all means.

Maybe a desire for affection from someone you trust?