[Depeche_Mood]

I've finally flat-lined for the moment, so I'll try to type this out as fast as I can,

a little about my me since i'm new:

I'm a 26 year old diagnosed Bi-polar II/schizophrenic who has been out of treatment for 5 years and is not on any medications. I have no family down here because I live out of state and am currently unemployed due to a recent breakdown I had that forced me to leave the job I had just started. I am over my head right now and need financial assistance.

I'm about to lose my car due to repossession if I can't find someone to help me out financially. I have no family members that can help me in this way because they are dealing with their own financial stresses right now, and my friends can't help me because most are living paycheck to paycheck, or their parents wouldn't allow them to give a large amount of money out to someone who couldn't pay it back to them in a reasonable time frame.

I'm completely out of sorts right now. This last paycheck that I'm getting from the job I just left will be enough to cover this months insurance and the down payment I have to make at the same time to renew my policy, and it must be payed on the 24th this month or I will lose my insurance, in effect losing my license and having to pay the 500 dollar reinstatement fee that Virginia has put in place if such an event occurs. I'm behind on my car payments by $400(give or take) the guy has been working with me for the last few months to let me catch up but he is reaching the end of his patients waiting for me to settle up. I've also got various other things due like personal property taxes and school related expenses that I owe before the term is up that I have no idea how I'm going to pay for.

I'll be taking out a Perkins loan through my school to help with various expenses piling up but it won;t be here until the end of the year, and I'm afraid that it will be to late. Because of where i live the predominant industry here is retail and manufacturing, all of which I don't have the skill set (or certs) to be above the general associate positions, and the ones available are highly demanding and highly stressful environment. The job I just left put me in a position where I had to leave due to the stress of the job. I was hired on because of my experience as a front line person, then suddenly was put in charge of the night crew because they were all new hires or recently hired (with in a few months of me coming in.) I tried to stay on because they were in such need of someone to help lead, but I had a psychotic breakdown while at work one night and haven't been able to break out of it as of yet. I'm worried that I am schizophrenic or that my condition has manifested itself into something more serious..

My fiancee depends on me to handle all of the other bills outside of rent, She herself is disabled with Multiple Sclerosis and can't stand up and take care of this situation while i'm regaining my sanity again and waiting for this (hopefully temporary) time to pass. Nor should she have to, she deals with enough. I feel awful everyday that I have this condition and can't function normally in a job without this happening every time I try to do the right thing.

I would go to a psychiatric hospital and voluntarily commit myself right now, if I didn't have to make weekly payments on this car we have, I truly can't afford to get the help I need. There is so much more that I need to get off my chest, but my thoughts(and writing) are so disorganized that I can't do it right now. Maybe if I had access to that Dragon computer program this would be a better read.

I need a miracle badly, and a clear mind so that I can clean up this mess I'm in and get my life on track to where I want it to go!

[33yankee33]

Hi Depech_Mood. You certainly have alot on your plate right now. Is it possible for you to hook into a gov't subsidized program to get your meds free or a low cost. Here in Texas there are programs. Remember that this too shall pass. I will be praying for you. Good luck.

[lynn P.]

I'm sorry you're in a stressful situation. You should be able to apply for social assistance for now until you get stable. The 1st thing you need to do is get stable and social assistance will get you medical coverage. With you being bipolar and schizophrenic, you really do need medication and therapy. If you do lose your car, its not that bad - there's always public transit and this is a lot cheaper than car and insurance payments. The main thing is you need to get stabilized first. There's also a way to get cheaper meds and here's a link for a discount on meds through PC thanks to Doc John sharing this here:
http://forums.psychcentral.com/showt...nt+medications

[Depeche_Mood]

Thank you both for your support. I will certainly look into these programs you both have told me about. Unfortunately I live in an area where public transportation can't reach me so hopefully something will work out for the meantime while we are waiting on our loans for next year. I'll be glad to rid my life of this stress once that time comes.

Thanks again for your help!