No one is alone on this earth because he is there for us :)

I cried a lot today and I knew this would not get me anywhere. I just sat in my chair, and opened the windows. The smell of fresh air...The scent of flowers whose names I didn’t know. I just stared at the sky and smiled.
I had a reason to smile too. I slept well yesterday after a long time. A long time. Every night I would promise myself that I would not be doing this again, and I would be praying the next day but I always broke my promises, then again to be depressed, morbid and sad.
“Hey lord almighty, are you out there” I didn’t know why I asked that. I never wanted to do that. The unsympathetic Atheist in me would never have allowed me to do so. Still, breaking all of my stiffness, my cold logical conclusions, something came, like a lightening, very strong and I cried again-
“Oh almighty. Why do you make me cry like a baby? Everybody says us to believe in Science. I also did. But Science didn’t cry with me when I was so broken hearted. Science never gave a definite reason behind my insecurities, confusions and sadness. It left me more and more confused. I flew like a grasshopper searching love, but people told me I am not enough for them. I yearned like a child for a better life, but people argued with me that I lack commonsense and logic. Everybody had abandoned me but…
Why did you stay with me lord?
Why did you cry with me when the world was asleep, when I felt like death was the only solace and I must do it, and I looked at you...Why did you cry with me lord? Why do you care me? Why do you love me? Why are you not selfish like us? How can you shower compassion on ingrates like us?
Why did you help me lord when I haven’t done anything?
Why did you create new new horizons for me when I found my life was so dumb, and depressing? Why did you fill my heart with new passions and vibrations? Why did you do that?
Were those dark nights, of confusions and self-doubts a lesson for me? To know who I am, to understand me better, to love me better, so I could love the world more.
Then why I was afraid of you?
I am sorry lord I did loath you too.
You exists lord. You exist. I know by now. You are everything. You create everything. You create love, you create hopes, and you create lives. You are the ocean of cosmic bliss. You exist in the highest mountain as well as the tiniest seed.
It took me a long time to know this, it is true.
Still, I am happy that I have found you.
I will not believe anyone who would argue or doubt about your existence. I don’t care, because I can feel you. You are here, with in me. Within my reach.
My world will not be the same as it used to be. I will try to find beauty in everything. I will try to smile even if I would have to cry. I don’t need anything, except your compassion my lord.
I will try to find the world as one beautiful garden, or as a beautiful dream, where all of us are assigned to live our lives to the fullest. I will not allow my life to be bad. I would like to smile every single second and I would like to spread my arms to everyone, who needs a helping hand, just as I do, to all lonely people, all sad people, everyone, to help them in lighting their candles of happiness.
I would be a good dreamer of beautiful dreamer from today onwards.
My belief in you will be firm and I don’t need any further proof. I love you and will love you ever and ever.”
I knew tears were trickling down my cheeks, but I didn’t bother to wipe. I just kept telling –“God is great’

Walk In Beauty

Yes i will
Thank you

beautiful!!!

Thank you

Thank you

I understand what you mean by feeling unloved, unaccepted just for who YOU are. I was always being told I was a dummy, you must change this, you must conform to that, you deserve being mistreated, etc... it kills the spirit and the soul.
When I had enough and fought back , its like an angry monster would surface...not truly who I am. Its almost like being a caged animal finally fighting back with zero tolerance anymore.
Living a life feeling unworthy of unconditional love and acceptance truly caused me to spiral into this abyss that I myself don't comprehend.
I am alone now, isolating because I don't know what else to do, don't want to hurt my loved ones, yet I don't feel lonely. I have returned back to God, thankful everyday of his patience with me.