[Butterflygirl]

Spirituality is that "vital principle or animating force traditionally believed to be within living beings." I believe that tapping into this rich inner resource transforms us, or alters our attitudes and feelings to the extent that we can change what we have never been able to change before.

How spirituality works is a mystery. It is something that is often observed but not necessarily understood. I have observed people overcome their fear of change with the aid of spirituality. They start out at the mercy of their old habits. They are powerless over their inner compulsions and have no strength to fight back. They habitually re-enact behavior that is self-destructive and life-threatening. Then, in a moment of agony, they call out "God help me," and somewhere deep in their soul they surrender. They admit they are powerless and they ask for help. Then, sometimes quickly and sometimes slowly, they are filled with the power of the spirit and...

⋅ They feel willing, when before they felt hesitant;

⋅ They feel courageous, when before they felt terrified;

⋅ They feel guided, when before they felt lost;

⋅ They feel loved, when before they felt abandoned;

⋅ They feel wise, when before they felt confused;

⋅ They feel hopeful, when before they felt despair;

⋅ They feel as if they are at the start of a glorious new journey, when before they felt near death.

There is more than one way to have a spiritual awakening. For some people it will happen suddenly during one dramatic moment, a moment from which there is no turning back. For others it happens slowly. Over time, they just find themselves with a new attitude about a Higher Power and spirituality. Their closed mind becomes open and curious. They pray and they feel connected to their Higher Power. Or they act "as if" a Higher Power exists, and in time they come to believe. Some people practice meditation to find a Higher Power. Others may read spiritual literature or talk to people about spirituality. Whatever they do, they must do it repetitively, and they must not give up. If they are really seeking spirituality with an open mind they will find it. If they really ask for spirituality with a humble heart, it will be given to them.

I had a spiritual awakening in 1983 and it changed my life forever.

[KathyM]

For me, it was November of 1996, and spiritual awakening was the furthest thing from my mind. After watching my best friend and both my parents suffer and die, I wanted to walk away from all that and focus on life - my life - finally.

Instead, I was diagnosed with the same illness my mother had (familial amyloidosis) and told I only had a few years left of eyesight and mobility. On the way home from that appointment, I was in shock and completely terrified.

After years of watching my mother suffer in agony to the point of suicide attempts, being diagnosed with the same illness was my BIGGEST fear come true. I used to turn off all the lights in my apartment and try to navigate my way around. Each time, I'd stumble into something and think "I could NEVER be a blind person." Over time, I felt sorry for mom and often thought maybe it would have been better if she had succeeded in her attempts - seemed especially cruel for her to suffer like that year after year. I thought I was in the clear because I thought her problems were due to diabetes, not amyloidosis.

I spent two years searching the world for treatment, but there isn't any for my type. The only docs who are interested in me are those who want to dissect and study my body - the only people who care are those who want me dead.

My world had been turned upside down, and I was completely cornered. I had no choice but to turn to God and open my heart completely to God's will.

I'd say terminal illness is a sure-fire way to reach spiritual enlightenment, but I don't recommend it. It may have its perks, but there are definite downsides.

[nowheretorun]

i'm gonna try responding to this but discussing spirituality is difficult for me... it's something i feel but find very challenging to verbalize...

i was weak and broken down and that moment came, letting go, admitting my powerlessness and seeking help just as it'd been described from "god", the higher power...

in my case it took time because while ready in heart, i wasn't ready in mind...

God took his sweet time with me, allowed me to fall back a few times but each time i came a little closer to where i am today, that all is God's plan and it is the only plan there is...

[wickedwings]

((((kathy)))) i know exactly how you feel when you discovered your diagnosis. i went through a very similar experience in a different way. my dad died from a strange brain disease in 2001. in december 2005, when i was only 33, i had a stroke. i was terrified because i thought i ended up with my dad's brain disease. i spent months wondering before i was finally diagnosed. shortly before i was diagnosed, my neurologist had talked about the possibility of my having to have a brain biopsy to find out what in the heck my brain lesion was about. i didn't know if i was going to live or not. it was a year ago when i was finally diagnosed, after my 5th mri scan. before my diagnosis, it was like i had one foot in this life and the other foot in the afterlife. it was very strange, feeling like my world was moving out of existence and feeling the afterlife was only a few steps away. it wasn't scary, but just very strange.