[Toughcooki]

I *believe* in God.
I can't bring myself to believe anything else. I mean - the trappings of religion. I used to find such comfort in church and so on. Now, I doubt everything.
I haven't been traumatized by anyone at a church, I just doubt everything now I guess.

I believe in god, too

actually I have really struggled during lockdown, as I've been unable to get to church. I want to get back their, and I will, soon as it's safe

I'm a Believer myself. I had never left God in my life but I stopped going to church. I just don't like the way churches have changed recently. Plus, in being single and older, I've felt like I haven't been welcomed when I attend a church service. So I got tired of the coldness I've received at going to various churches.

Originally Posted by will19

I'm a Believer myself. I had never left God in my life but I stopped going to church. I just don't like the way churches have changed recently. Plus, in being single and older, I've felt like I haven't been welcomed when I attend a church service. So I got tired of the coldness I've received at going to various churches.

I am sorry that you went through that.

no one should make you feel that way at church. it is meant to be a safe place

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I am sorry that you went through that.

no one should make you feel that way at church. it is meant to be a safe place

Thank you for your nice reply. I'm a life-long "singleton" and it has been the way I have described at churches. If you Google in something like: "single people feeling unaccepted at churches", you will get lots of links for articles on that; and even some discussions that follow the articles.

[Toughcooki]

That's pretty silly of the church when you think of it. They're always looking to marry people off & bring people in. Seems like a classic two birds with one stone situation, lol.

Originally Posted by Toughcooki

That's pretty silly of the church when you think of it. They're always looking to marry people off & bring people in. Seems like a classic two birds with one stone situation, lol.

It never happened when I was going to church. I think that it would have been nice if people had tried to arrange meeting a woman for me. As far as I can recall, it happened only once or twice in over 20 years of going to church. All of those two arrangements didn't pan out to be anything.

So ignoring me still went on.

[Toughcooki]

Possibly they were uncomfortable, not sure how to act/react. Did you join the church, or just attend? Did you stay for special functions, join any committees, anything like that? Churches tend to be a bit clique-ey... I have tried a lot of denominations, and I think the one that was most welcoming and friendly was a Seventh Day Adventist church. Basically regular Christians but they do church on Saturday. I'm an introvert - they were wayyyyyy too friendly for my comfort levels, lol.

[LilyMop]

I’m feeling lost. I started to go back to church just before the lockdown. It was really helping me. Since then I’ve attended several online and I haven’t found somewhere I think I would fit in. I’ve thought about joining a bible study group instead of church because I honestly feel a bit overwhelmed with the cliques plus the obligation of time and money.

I'd be going to church too, but I agree with @will19 . It's very hard to feel welcomed in a new church you haven't been to before. Been there, done that, and it would have been nice if they had tried to arrange for meeting another Christian to marry. I believe in God myself. Best to you, I'll pray for you @Toughcooki

Originally Posted by Toughcooki

Possibly they were uncomfortable, not sure how to act/react. Did you join the church, or just attend? Did you stay for special functions, join any committees, anything like that? Churches tend to be a bit clique-ey... I have tried a lot of denominations, and I think the one that was most welcoming and friendly was a Seventh Day Adventist church. Basically regular Christians but they do church on Saturday. I'm an introvert - they were wayyyyyy too friendly for my comfort levels, lol.

I had mostly just attended. I had gone to some functions when I had attended a church for a good while. They were alright but never felt connected. It felt superficial. Also, since just attending church and have enrolled in some classes, I didn't feel encouraged that I belonged. I would have wanted to be a member and be on committees if I had felt encouraged.

One time, around 25 years ago, I was going to a Methodist Church. Within the last 30-35 years of my life, it was the best church I went to. I realized it just recently. At one time, when I was unemployed, I went to see the Pastor about it. He offered me a janitorial job that was three hours a week, but be paid cash for it along with my unemployment benefit. It helped. But it was that he cared for me and then others at that church started to follow suit. Oh and by the way, the Pastor was single himself. When I felt that encouragement, I had done the bulletin for the Sunday services and it got better. But then, the Pastor left and the new one was not as good. Things had changed at that church. Attendance declined and then the new Pastor drafted people to join committees. I was drafted into one and it did not go well. So I ended up not going there anymore. After that the church folded.

I know that the last paragraph was pretty long, so sorry about that. After that church, I had attended various ones and stayed with them for a while. And then they went nowhere for me and I felt like I had wasted my time. As I got older, it just got worse.

I had stopped going altogether about a year before the shutdowns. The churches haven't opened up in my area yet, but if they do, then it may be a while before I will go to one again. I prefer to go to a church and feel like I'm a part of it than just to do it alone. I end up feeling worse when I go and don't feel welcomed more so than feeling guilty for not going at all.

[Toughcooki]

Originally Posted by 2daffodils

I'd be going to church too, but I agree with @will19 . It's very hard to feel welcomed in a new church you haven't been to before. Been there, done that, and it would have been nice if they had tried to arrange for meeting another Christian to marry. I believe in God myself. Best to you, I'll pray for you @Toughcooki

Thank you!!! Appreciated!!

[Prycejosh1987]

Its okay to have doubts. Its not okay to dwell on them, you have address your concerns with a church leader. You could try gotquestions.org