[Basshead]

On Friday I texted my ex wife asking her if I could get my son next weekend instead of this last weekend since I'm off. She has been giving him to be on the weekends that I work and I dont get to spent much time with him b/c I have to go to bed early and get up early (I work 4a-4p). A few hours later she responded back no a judge granted her sole custody of our son and me supervised visitation. She hasn't agreed on anyone to supervise me so I don't get to see him til she does. Unfortunatly I was at work when all this took place. I came unglued. I was an emotional wreck. I was mad, pissed off, terrified, scared, angry, confused, overwhelmed. I started hearing voices moments after I read the text messages. They were yelling and cussing at me, her, her dad, screaming and cussing in general. Some I couldnt understand, but most I could. Some were calm and very scary about what they were telling me to do.
Now my ex doesn't know I am currently having problems with my Schizoaffective disorder. She knows I have a past history with it, but not that I am having a problem with it now. As far as she is concerned, I haven't had problems with it in years. My son is only 7, so even if I had told him which I didnt he wouldn't even understand what it is. So I know for a fact none of this custody battle has to do with my Schizoaffective disorder.
Yesterday I was supposed to have an appt with my T doc at the VA. I get there and she had called in. Since I had driven so far to make my appt they got some other T doc to agree to see me. She was very nice through out our session. I told her about my ex and what she had pulled. I told her about the voices, how they were screaming and yelling and telling me to do bad things, and everything else. My original T doc had taken me off my anti psycotic, which wasnt helping me anyways, so I've been battling voices off and on for about 2 months now which sucks big time. With everything going on this new T doc was worried about me to the point she wanted to admit me yesterday to get me stabilized on an anti psychotic. I seem to have a history of being on meds that dont work. I think she called it being med resistant?? And if it ain't that I'm allergic to it. Lucky me the VA had a ward on one of the upper levels of the hospital. I told her with my work schedule there would be no way I could, plus I had my dad with me which legally he can't drive due to having seizures and we had no one to come pick him up.

I'm sorry I took so long to say everything ya'll. I feel so lost and don't know what to do.

[worthit]

I'm sorry you're going through this. I think the most important thing is that you spoke to someone about it and are getting help now. I've tried and as my pdoc calls it" failed" 20 medications with allergic reactions or aggressive reactions. So I think I'm medication resistant too. Good luck and know that you have us here to listen.

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[Basshead]

thanks worthit.....that does help to know

[DePressMe]

Bass, I too have struggled to find a med combo that works for me--one med is not enough. I've taken a whole slew of meds but now I'm on haldol and seroquel for my psychotic thoughts--I take other meds for different mood issues. Don't give up on the meds. Keep trying them until you find something that works for you....hang in there.......D.

[worthit]

As of now,I'm waiting on my prolactin level results to tell me if the medication I've been on now since May has to be changed . So maybe here we go again!