[lostandconfused89]

So I've been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder for about a month now, and I am already on several medications. But I'm a complete mess! The biggest problem I'm having, well prob the only one, is depression. Take tonight for example. We had a cook out and a lot of family I never see was here. I was so excited for them to show up, until they got here. All of a sudden, I didn't want to socialize and stayed in my room a depressed mess the whole time they were here. I'm talking a deep deep depression.. Then, like someone flipped a switch, I felt great and wanted to be around everyone. I came downstairs, but everyone was already gone.. Does this happen to anyone else? I go from deathly depressed to happy and full of energy about 10 times a day and its driving me insane!! Maybe im not stable yet? Idk, just wandering if this is normal for the disorder, or I'm just a weirdo... I really look forward to hearing from you guys!

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[NanuConfused]

Back when I was in the hospital I had horrible mood swings, sounds like the same thing. I sort of go through the mood swings when there's lots of people around too! Like I feel really depressed around people, but then when I'm alone and sulking by myself, I get anxious because I feel like I have to be around people. You're not the only one who's a mess here don't worry lol!

[dmhobbit]

Originally Posted by lostandconfused89

So I've been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder for about a month now, and I am already on several medications. But I'm a complete mess! The biggest problem I'm having, well prob the only one, is depression. Take tonight for example. We had a cook out and a lot of family I never see was here. I was so excited for them to show up, until they got here. All of a sudden, I didn't want to socialize and stayed in my room a depressed mess the whole time they were here. I'm talking a deep deep depression.. Then, like someone flipped a switch, I felt great and wanted to be around everyone. I came downstairs, but everyone was already gone.. Does this happen to anyone else? I go from deathly depressed to happy and full of energy about 10 times a day and its driving me insane!! Maybe im not stable yet? Idk, just wandering if this is normal for the disorder, or I'm just a weirdo... I really look forward to hearing from you guys!

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Hi lostandconfused89,

I'm glad you shared your experiences since being on medication and just recently diagnosed. I can't imagine being on such a wild rollercoaster... I have a longer rollercoaster with bigger drops and rises but much slower. I feel like I've been depressed for over a month now and it just sucks to get up in the morning. I have to have routine. I get up, make the coffee, have my morning cigarette (trying to quit down to 3-4 a day now) and feed the cats and take care of their water and litter pan. Then I sit and get on the computer to see what other people in my support groups including this one are doing. I lack happiness, motivation, gratitude, etc... ad nauseum. But I did one thing yesterday that I didn't even pat myself on the back for and that was I took a long bike ride to the next town up to pick up most of my prescriptions that are due. As far as socializing I can handle a few people at a time (like five or less) and find gatherings too much to handle. Besides the mania/depressive episodes I also suffer from panic disorder so that makes it even harder to be around a lot of people... things like thought broadcasting, paranoia, being inarticulate, things like that... so I can totally relate to not suddenly wanting to be around so many people; although I attribute most of it due to my panic and anxiety.

Give yourself some time to adjust to the meds, if not feeling better in a few more weeks DO let your p-doc know. Welcome to the group!

Much Peace,

[lostandconfused89]

Thanks everyone!
It makes me feel better to be able to share with everyone. When I was first diagnosed, I thought that I had a grip on all of this. I'm really trying to get started on a routine, but I'm having trouble with it due to these mood changes. I too get up and have my morning cigarette lol my depression seems the worse in the morning, so all I want to do is just sit outside and feel sorry for myself for about 20 min I too lack happiness and motivation... The motivation being the big one for me.. Its amazing that u were able to ride your bike to get the things u need! That's something I could never do. Socializing sucks for me, and its upsetting because I used to love being around people! But I feel like I don't know anyone anymore, or that they are judging when they look at me. When I try to talk to them, I feel like they are thinking how dumb I am, and wandering why I'm even around... So I go to my room and just sit there, anxiously waiting for everyone to leave so I can go on with my evening. Panic disorder sounds horrible! I'm so sorry you have to go through all of that. everything is so much worse when I start to panic! I'm trying to give myself time to adjust to these meds, but its hard to! For some reason I want this instant gratification that I know I'm not gonna get that. My Pdoc says it could take up to three months to fully b in my system! That's insane! Idk, sorry I tend to start rambling on when I get excited lol thanks everyone for the support! I'll try to keep u guys updated on everything! Hope everyone is doing OK!

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[worthit]

Yeah,you're normal for a Schizoaffective. Probably bipolar type? The mood swings drive me' crazy'. But I just acknowledge it's the illness and get through. Had a few day bout of depression with self harm thoughts last month,then, last week,manic for 4 days,no sleep. Its exhausting. That's just the nature of the illness.

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[lostandconfused89]

I'm glad to hear its normal for someone with my condition. Its weird, but it makes me feel better. I have to start thinking this is my illness and not something else. Its just really hard to... I'm sorry u have to go through all that, it sounds like a really bad time. As far as I know, no mania for me as of yet. Not looking forward to when it does happen... Thanks everyone, and be safe!

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[dmhobbit]

Originally Posted by lostandconfused89

Thanks everyone!
It makes me feel better to be able to share with everyone. When I was first diagnosed, I thought that I had a grip on all of this. I'm really trying to get started on a routine, but I'm having trouble with it due to these mood changes. I too get up and have my morning cigarette lol my depression seems the worse in the morning, so all I want to do is just sit outside and feel sorry for myself for about 20 min I too lack happiness and motivation... The motivation being the big one for me.. Its amazing that u were able to ride your bike to get the things u need! That's something I could never do. Socializing sucks for me, and its upsetting because I used to love being around people! But I feel like I don't know anyone anymore, or that they are judging when they look at me. When I try to talk to them, I feel like they are thinking how dumb I am, and wandering why I'm even around... So I go to my room and just sit there, anxiously waiting for everyone to leave so I can go on with my evening. Panic disorder sounds horrible! I'm so sorry you have to go through all of that. everything is so much worse when I start to panic! I'm trying to give myself time to adjust to these meds, but its hard to! For some reason I want this instant gratification that I know I'm not gonna get that. My Pdoc says it could take up to three months to fully b in my system! That's insane! Idk, sorry I tend to start rambling on when I get excited lol thanks everyone for the support! I'll try to keep u guys updated on everything! Hope everyone is doing OK!

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Great news for you... just a few more weeks and you will know if the medication is working for you or you need to increase your dose or try another medication for another one. This still is not an exact science as everybody's body chemistry is different... the Sinequan I'm taking (a trycyclic) for depression may make you suicidal while the Zoloft I was initally was put on did that to me. Called p-doc immediately and he put me on this I have been successfully for years now. You can read my DX and RX below in my signature.

Keep on posting and let us know how you are doing. Oh and yea panic disorder sucks. I had to quit playing bass for a band because I was having stage fright and panic attacks left and right before we played out just in rehearsal. I can get out and ride my bike, but socializing at a large family gatherings is hard.

Take care,