[Lizcraze]

im 14, probaly younger than alot of people on here, but please don't treat me any diffarantly, and sorry for my poor spelling . I have Schizophrenia. I have hallucinations about alot of things. For example, bugs crawling all over me, people watching me all the time everywhere I go, I am suspicous about everyone, even my own mother. I think that some people can read my mind, and I get freaked out. And I always feel like someone's going to be in my house, so I search everywhere before I do anything. I have this toy bunny in my room that I sleep with , and I feel that someone put a camera in it to spy on me, so most nights I fling it across the room, or end up yelling at "the camera" that is in there. I get so suspicious of people, that I now hate going places. I just want to find help and see how other people are coping with this. Everytime I go outside, I look all around feeling like someone is watching me at all times. And when I go to sleep, I always feel like someone watches me sleep. And sometimes I have hallucinations about crazy things. One day I was at this pond with a friend, and a large black object kept coming in and out of the water, and only I could see it. . I was freaked out. Well I would tell you more, but it is extremly late where I am, so I need to go to bed because I have alot to do tomorrow. Someone please reply back. thankyou

[costello]

Welcome to the forum, Lizcraze. I hope you find support and information here. You're not alone.

[mgran]

Hi Liz, I'm sorry you've got to live with this, and at such a young age. A lot of us on this forum have some kind of schizo diagnoses, so you'll find you're among friends. Do you, or your mother, have a good relationship with your doctor? You're probably too young for some of the antipsychotics out there, but a good doctor should be able to help.

[KUREHA]

Hi, I don't have schizophrenia, my doctor doesn't like to label - so I don't actually have anything, I think he just feels a bit guilty for lying to me.

Anyway I'm not sure about how to cope with it, I'm taking meds - my doctor said it will help, I'm going to try and stop them though, like usual.
I just like caffiene pills - I get so tired.

My nurse is coming in 2 weeks to give me ways to cope, so I'll post after that it she tells me anything helpful.

For right now though - my psychologist always told me to think through it - like was I jumping to conclusions, what would other people think.

[O-Dawg]

Hey Liz!

I TOTALLY understand the camera thing! There are cameras sitting outside my apartment windows so i always have to close the shades at night. I still don't feel safe. I rarely feel safe, so I know how you are feeling. Doesn't it suck that hallucinaitions are almost always bad or scary things? I wish I could see rainbows or pretty girls instead of scary things.

It sounds like you and me are a lot alike. If you ever want to talk, PM me

I find that you have to prove the scary things that you aren't afraid of them. They won't go away. They'll always be there. So I found that you have to act tougher than them and like you don't care that they're there. It's hard to do, but if there's a camera somewhere, try to act like you don't mind it. Sometimes, when I am undressing or in the shower and I swear that the camera is in the shower head, I'll just put on a show for it and it makes me feel better.

Hope this helps!

O-Dawg

[Lizcraze]

thats how i feel when i am in the shower too, I freak out because I feel like there is a camera there!! And the halucinations are worst at night for me! But lately When I feel like something is watching me or i see something thats too crazy to be real that my mind comes up with, i just say that it cant be real and no ones watching me. and it calms me down a little bit

[RunningEagleRuns]

I hope everything goes well for you.

[O-Dawg]

Liz,

You are lucky that you can tell yourself that nobody is watching. I have tried that so many times and it rarely works. What kinds of hallucinations do you get? (If you don't want to say, that's ok). I mainly see these things that I can't describe. I can't tell you what color they are, how big or what shape and it gets frustrating when people ask me what they look like. I can't tell them. Sometimes they will make noises too and they will follow people around. I'll see them almost attatching themselves to people and it makes me afraid to be around those people until they are gone.

[Lizcraze]

Originally Posted by O-Dawg

Liz,

You are lucky that you can tell yourself that nobody is watching. I have tried that so many times and it rarely works. What kinds of hallucinations do you get? (If you don't want to say, that's ok). I mainly see these things that I can't describe. I can't tell you what color they are, how big or what shape and it gets frustrating when people ask me what they look like. I can't tell them. Sometimes they will make noises too and they will follow people around. I'll see them almost attatching themselves to people and it makes me afraid to be around those people until they are gone.

My hallucinations are sometimes like yours. I see these big black shapes lurking around the corner, then hovering around people. Sometimes my hallucinations feel so real, like when I woke up, and looked in the mirror one morning, and my reflection started talking to me. omg that seemed so real. it scared me!! Lately my hallucinations are getting worse and more frequent. so are the voices. Another time I was at the lake with my friend and I saw this small black thing come out of the water and hover over my friends head for a long time. It freaked me out, and my friends kept wondering why I kept glancing above their heads

[Lizcraze]

Originally Posted by RunningEagleRuns

I hope everything goes well for you.

thanks you too

[O-Dawg]

Hey Liz

It kind of freaked me out because your hallucinations remind me of mine... Don't worry though I'm not mad that you told me. It's just weird becasue mine will go on top of people's heads a lot! I don't know what to call them, so I call them "the things". What if two people have the same exact hallucinations? (perhaps you and me) Would that mean that these things actually do exist? Maybe that most people don't have the ability to see them, but they are there?

[wiprwill]

I hope you will recover quickly. I have been and still am in shoes like yours. Meds help out a lot but they can't solve everything. I always have the fear that i'm being watched, and see blobs of black around every corner. I have gotten used to the voices and now I can turn them into laughs instead or horors. I wish you the best

[hawthoerne]

i used to see shadows out of the corner of my eye, i thought they were trying to kill me

[mgran]

Even on meds I still see things out of the corner of my eye. Shapeless shapes is the best way I can put it, an absence of light. They do cause me dread, and I've avoided places and situations where I know I'm prone to them. Sometimes you can feel them at your back, like a weight or a pressure, very cold.

I'm doing better with them now, I don't cave to them so quickly, but they're the most persistent problem.