[TheatreKid]

I can not afford to go crazy right now.

[newtus]

are you ok?

[TheatreKid]

I'm ok, I just feel like I have a very tenuous grip on myself right now... I feel like I'm about to crash.

Thanks.

[newtus]

we are here for you if you need help

[TheatreKid]

thank you.

[faerie_moon_x]

I hate it when I feel that way. I know what you mean. I hope you are okay.

[TheatreKid]

I have no money and nothing left to sell, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to hold a job that pays the bills. I'm trying to get through school but it's hard. I've dropped out several times.

Last night I couldn't shut off the voices, they kept me awake half the night. I'm still not sure if they were voices, or just thoughts racing through my head. If they were thoughts, they weren't MY thoughts.

[Twigs92]

Is there anyone you can talk to about this? Or make an emergency appointment with your pdoc?

[TheatreKid]

I see my pdoc next Wednesday, or at least my psych nurse. I'm not sure if my pdoc is back from vacation yet. I will definitely tell them about this.

I think it's stress. Money stress is awful, and I'm spending large amounts of time alone.

[newtus]

i spend large amounts of time alone too. money stress if someting i have as well. financial stress.

[ZehR]

Isolation does effect schiz a lot. People with schizoid personality disorder have been known to create whole civilizations in their head.

[Twigs92]

I agree with the others, being by myself worsens the deperssion, psychosis, and or mania, along with stress. Perhaps you could speak to friends? Or does your school have some sort of nurse or counsellor that you can speak to while your pdoc is on holiday?

[TheatreKid]

I feel self conscious about how dramatically I titled this thread.

I might try speaking to friends but it's hard. I do see my psych nurse on Wednesday.

[TheatreKid]

Also I am in such dire financial straights that I can't do it any more. Even at risk of overloading myself and winding up in hospital again, I need to find a job. But how do you find a job that is disability accommodating without disclosing your disability?

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by TheatreKid

Also I am in such dire financial straights that I can't do it any more. Even at risk of overloading myself and winding up in hospital again, I need to find a job. But how do you find a job that is disability accommodating without disclosing your disability?

You don't disclose until after you're hired....

[TheatreKid]

I'm trying to find a job that's disability friendly though... something with low hours so that I don't have to drop out of school, and not in a restaurant because I am allergic to heat. Somewhere that won't judge me for my 6 year gap in employment.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by TheatreKid

I'm trying to find a job that's disability friendly though... something with low hours so that I don't have to drop out of school, and not in a restaurant because I am allergic to heat. Somewhere that won't judge me for my 6 year gap in employment.

Did you qualify for work study via fafsa? Those jobs are flexible...made for students and pay well because the gov pays half you salary. If youre at a university labs often employ dishwashers this way...you come in when you want and clean glassware, autoclave and make basic solutions etc...stuff needs to get done but on your own schedule...

[TheatreKid]

I'm not in the US, but my school has something similar, a workstudy program. I've missed the deadline for a lot of the summer jobs though. I've applied for a job calling alumni and asking for donations... not a fun job, but it's choose your own shifts and follow a script, which I can do.

[Twigs92]

Usually retail jobs come with a four hour contract, they'll be hiring about now as students go back home.
I just accepted a 0 hours so I haven't told them about the bipolar, I wish I had as I'm going through a ***** of a depression and freaking out over everything and nothing but I can't risk getting less hours, and I haven't started meds yet. If it's zero hours just don't take it, they're entitled not to give you work and claim you aren't needed. My perception is skewed but I'm terrified they'll do that to me. Good luck!

[junkDNA]

hey im on disability and i work at a grocery store no more than 20 hours a week or ill lose my disability. i was just upfront with the manager and simply said i can only work 20 hours a week. its possible

[newtus]

but how do you tell them that your on disability? how do you break it to them? in what manner?

[junkDNA]

well i filled out a form online for them and it asked if im on disability and i selected yes. some places are willing to work with the disabled. just because one place wont doesnt mean they all wont. its nothing to be ashamed about (for me at least) but i know its hard to disclose that about urself to strangers.

[newtus]

do u live in the usa junkdna?

[junkDNA]

yes....north carolina

[newtus]

because im looking to work at target. so 20 hours per week is the max i can work?