Roll Call 25

I was a bit drunk when I wrote that. But they do bother me. Both my arms are ruined. I guess I'm moving on so I wish it had never happened

I'm having real trouble understanding speech (bits are just noise, like a foreign language I don't speak), and lately I've been hearing people say random words that make no sense, that they insist they never said, even though I definitely heard it. My parents think it's hilarious and keep taking the mickey, but it's not funny

Today my parents were talking in the car, but I wasn't really listening until I heard my Mum say "killing a bouncy castle", which immediately got my attention. So I asked them to repeat what they'd said and it was about a truck in front of us. So I asked what they'd said about killing a bouncy castle and they just started laughing.

And a couple of weeks ago, I had a voice mail from the GP surgery off a woman called Louise. So I asked my Mum if she knew who Louise was, and she said no I don't know a Louise there. And I asked Dad the same thing and he said the same. So they took me to the GP surgery and I asked the receptionist if I could speak to Louise, and my parents both said that I had said that I got a message off Nicola. Apparently they said that I'd said Nicola to each of them, and they had said Nicola back to me, so I'd heard Nicola 4x yet definitely heard Louise each time. That is also hilarious to them.

I'm either hearing words/noise that make no sense to me like it's in a foreign language, or I'm hearing words that people aren't saying! And despite it being highly frustrating and upsetting that I'm not understanding conversations and people are telling me they never said things that I most definitely heard them say, my parents think it's hilarious

ETA: this is happening A LOT, but those are the only 2 examples I can think of right now.

*Willow*

Have you tried any of the moisturisers that claim to help fade stretch marks and scars?

*Willow*

Or I think laser treatment may help, but it'd be expensive privately. A friend looked into it as her GP said the NHS wouldn't fund it, but I think her dermatologist said it probably wouldn't help much. But maybe you could ask a specialist if laser would help?

*Willow*

I've made an appt to see my gp and see what they could offer. I've tried silicone gels and creams but they made little difference. I need some cutting out and stiching back up and if they won't offer laser I will save up for it

- LympheDIVAs

Have you seen these...they are sleeves for people with cancer made to look like tattoo sleeves etc. Might be a good thing until you get what you want done...

have u heard of Mederma? it works really well. but u have to use it consistently for a number of months. i had scars all over my shins. like more than 100 scars. and mederma got rid of them

So what is the clearance time on benzos?
I stopped clonapin about a week ago because I have been hearing how addictive they are. Ive been on them for years and no one ever told me how bad they are until I began reading here on PC.

I think I have found what is making me so sick lately....withdrawls.
I was taking 1-2 mg a day. Tapered to 1/2mg for a week then quit totally last week. I feel horrible and want to go back on but will not do it knowing the addiction to them. How long will i feel this horrible?!?!
I cant function or think or sleep and anxiety is so bad...

punky

so the voices came back yesterday. the shot wore off before i got the next one. but my pdoc said i can get the next onetoday. so my nurse gave it to me. which means they should be gone by tomm.......T is calling tonight, tohelp me take meds. i realy hope they are gone tomm bc i have to work 2 to 8

also hope im off at least one day this weekend so my mom can visit. she hasnt met toby yet

welll im just sitting here listening to loud music. it seems to help

Benzodiazepine withdrawal syndrome - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Two months to a year and even a small re-exposure will put you right back to square one. They are pure hell. The are not supposed to prescribed for more than a few weeks due to these issues and docs never tell you how the withdrawal will be worse than your original anxiety...

You might have to taper off more slowly. My cousin finally got off of them at 2 years....but she was trying for a while.

Well, I'm ****ed. I've been taking a fairly high dose of these for a long time now. Boy that pisses me off. Just more proof that doctors are incompetent pieces of ****.

Yeah I heard go down an eighth at a time. Every 2 weeks. I'm not looking forward to coming off them. I should have never been put on them. This old psych nurse I had put me on them when I was having akathisia. I should have been given congentin or inderal not lorazepam.

[QsUOTE=Atypical_Disaster;3760330]Well, I'm ****ed. I've been taking a fairly high dose of these for a long time now. Boy that pisses me off. Just more proof that doctors are incompetent pieces of ****.[/QUOTE]

Ur strong, I think you'll be able to come off them when the time comes. Just have to go down a little at a time.

i was doing a LOT of xanax illegally, like getting high off of it. i got hospitalized and didnt have it anymore and i went thru the worst withdrawals ever (except methadone, they were worse) i was SOOOOO paranoid and anxious and would have panic attaks. it sucks. but it doesnt last forever

Hey newtus and Erti where are u guys?

Ur strong, I think you'll be able to come off them when the time comes. Just have to go down a little at a time.[/QUOTE]

I have no doubt that I'm strong enough, it's just going to be a pain in the ***. I'm so sick of psychiatry right now. Now that I'm well it's all just more annoying to me than it already was... go to appointments, pick up meds, blah blah blah. It's all so boring and it's irritating to know more about my illnesses than my doctors do. I read, I research, I know my **** and I'm sick of being talked down to by these people who don't even bother to look in their own ****ing DSM.

My appointment today was a complete waste of time. I don't know why I have to talk to some doctor that's involved in a ridiculously idiotic system that doesn't care about anything except what meds you're taking and how well that's working out for Big Pharma.

Honestly if they are working for you and you aren't getting tolerance or addictive/abuse behaviors there isn't a huge benefit to getting off the things---its just going to make you feel terrible. If you can't sleep without them or something like that they can even be perceived as beneficial. I considered them when I couldn't sleep but some are worse than others...the fast acting ones like xanax are the worst. But yes the docs are often pieces of **** I know even my doc who I really liked did not explain the getting off the meds part and I had so much trouble with just an AP which isn't even supposed to be mildly addictive...

i fell down an hurt my knee and the voices just laughed a lot. mean. they r bullies. from hell.

I just hate being dependent on anything. I take a lot of pride in being self-sufficient so when I have to rely on anyone or anything it pisses me off. I'd love to just live my life without having to pop into my pdoc's office periodically to get my prescriptions filled when she clearly doesn't realize I'm different from all the other patients that walk through her door. I'm different, and professionals need to get that through their ****ing heads.

I know, I have those days too. That one psych nurse really f_cked me over. First putting me on seroquel and gaining all that weight and then the lorazepam. Why didn't she tell me it was akathisia? Honestly I don't think she knew. I've had to find out most of the information about my illness by doing my own research. And that includes meds, finding out the hard way...

Yeah when I first got akathisia nobody told me what the **** was going on. I was so debilitated by it I couldn't even get on the computer to research on what was wrong. It wasn't until I got off of the AP in question that I was able to research it and find out that it was akathisia.

They don't have a clue. I'm not your average patient. I'm not your average person period. Professionals are beyond incompetent for not realizing that about me.

I take 2mgs at night with benadryl for sleep. I'm not that worried about it at this point. If I still have a hard time sleeping I don't take more lorazepam, I add doxepin. Usually works.

I know I already decided my new pdoc is incompetent---she asked about sleep issues I told her I was just waking up around 4am but think my sleep cycle adjusted because I had to get up early for 3-4 days. She said with clear conviction that peoples sleep cycles do not change that quickly.....Bzzt wrong///looked it up some shift workers change their cycle in as little as one night combined with this possible bipolar crap well I don't think much of her right now.

But yeah once you've been stabilized on a med why don't we get infinite prescriptions? I can't see any reason for the every 2 month check in appointment unless there is actually a change...we spent the entire time discussing random bs in those appointments at $80 a pop... Why?

Hahahaha yeah she sounds like an idiot.

Infinite prescriptions, that would be lovely. And yes exactly all I do in my appointments now is talk about whatever is on my mind at the time! Then I end up feeling like she's not listening to me so it's even more pointless. I hate it when doctors treat me like I'm just some ordinary patient. I'm not. I'm educated about my illness and I'm not going to sit there asking a bunch of questions because guess what? *I* know the answers, not them.

im here. just dont know what to say.