Roll Call 42

Why do you want to do this? Did something happen?

Chickenfoot I have to admit I'm concerned we all like you here it would be a much more boring place without you....please reconsider....

And you're sure its real? May be why it didn't work.....

i need lotion and chapstick but i dont wanna move

chickenfoot i hope u rethink ur plans and decide to talk to someone u feel safe with about them. i am concerned about you and dont want you to do anything so permanent like that

Chickenfoot, what's going on? I'm very concerned.

On another note, I made it to the new pdoc. I like him so far, although he's kinda odd.

I have lost 6 lbs. I thought I was gaining, but I'm not yay! I really need to work on my self esteem. I tell myself some horrible things. I've also realized that my self worth has been based on my looks and sexuality. Now that I'm older, it just sucks. Then that weight gain from the seroquel. I still need to work on myself.

Ugh...I just over ate. I haven't done that in awhile....

lol yea its real
i got it from my mom

actually i got my ambien dosage wrong. its not 1mg of ambien. its 10mg.

And I shouldn't have said he's odd, lol. I'm odd too.

You do seem manic newtus. I think you should rethink the sza idea.

why do you say that? because i seem manic? i didnt give myself these diagnoses

yall are playing armchair psychiatrists

No one said you did. The point is that it sounds like something more than "just" schizophrenia is going on. I've been reading roll call for well over a year now and I've seen your moods cycle time and time again.

I highly recommend that you bring this up with your doctors...

Nobody's doing that. All of us are giving opinions, that's all.

i dont know what to say. honestly. i think you guys might be confusing this a bit. ive usually always gone by what my doctors say. ive taken stuff like lithium before it doesnt work. in the past. was on a high dose too and low dose. i sort of think this is where feeling emotionally ok and manic gets mixed up.

ive been diagnosed schizoaffective before. but doctors dont think im manic. i dont think i really am either. how could i get past doctors like this for 10+ years?

ive told you guys ive been diagnosed schizoaffective before but its been with depression

Frankly I don't care what your exact diagnosis is, newtus. All I want(and I think what the other people here also want), is for you to get the help and support that you need and deserve. And if your treatment team doesn't know the full picture, then they aren't going to know how to most effectively help you.

I think that bringing this up will benefit you, because you'll either get a more accurate diagnosis, or sza bipolar type will be ruled out. Either way, you win. But only if you open up about this stuff.

hah wow bipolar has already been ruled out. i told my psychiatrist everything i could about me when i first saw him. prob more. i dont get it. wow

everytime i goto the hospital bipolar is ruled out too. and they watch me during my most extreme times

I updated my post properly as I realize I misspoke.

Do you tell them that you drive with the door open, light fires, are hyper sexual can't sleep, talk too fast etc. They can't know it unless you tell them it's only transient but also cyclic.

how would i win? win at what?
ive been at this clinic for two and half years. i told my psychiatrist everything about me and so did my dad. my dad goes into the sessions with me and has since ive been at this clinic.

ive been at the hospital prob 7 times or so since ive been at this clinic. what am i winning at?

im on pretty much the right meds. i just dont like taking them. i shouldnt even have to explain that part either. thats a given.

so somtimespsychotic says im manic and now you all think im manic?

i rarely talk fast. i figured out a month ago im not hypersexual. ive always had trouble sleeping im on sleeping meds for it.

I DONT UNDERSTAND. THERES NO ISSUE HERE. im not cycling moods. not to where theres a problem.

sometimes says something about me. and then everyone pitches in and then everyones on my back again. no offense to you guys but how am i going to take the medical opinion of a forum when ive been in the hospital some 20 times and seen dozens of doctors? you have to be kidding me.

Idk newtus. What I don't get is you say you're paranoid and hallucinating etc and I don't get how you have no problem leaving the house. I'm bipolar and sometimes I get so paranoid I can't leave the house.

You also seem to have a fluctuating mood. But from what I've seen its rapid. I don't feel comfortable saying any more bc I know you'll get extremely angry with me.

I m not a psych I never said you were manic so much as I said it sounded manic....I thought it might open a new avenue to better treatment for you but if you aren't interested In that its none of my business. If you are bring it up with your docs....