[strawberrysnow]

I am not certain that I have schizophrenia but after doing my homework on what may be wrong with me I seem to identify with most all of the symptoms I took the sanity score and it told me I scored 100% for schizophrenia and lower on everything else the other two red barred ones were depression and disassociation and phobias. but not as high of a percentage.I know something isn't right with me I keep seeing and hearing things I am 17 I started having these things happen to me last year and at first I wrote it off as stress or lack of sleep but they kept getting worse and worse till the voices were telling me my pets were dead or put thoughts in my head of self harming myself with whatever object I was holding they would tell me I am worthless or pathetic and they would mock me There were times when I was wondering if I was possessed or going crazy I see things normally people they come and go before my eyes they are like ghosts or something and if I am staring at something for long enough of time I may see a face or a person in the corner of my eye or even right in front of me when I make myself aware of them they vanish. I find it hard to focus on anything at all and I have lack of motivation or interest I find it hard to keep on track or to finish anything anymore I never used to be like this I used to be on top of my game I feel like I Don't know I just feel so confused and scared and I look at myself in the mirror I don't seem like me I scare myself when I see myself I don't know what to do I don't know where to turn..I am too afraid to tell my parents I don't know how to approach this situation I don't want to be rejected or the opinions that people have of me to change I can't handle that I am already too self conscience how can I tell them? what will they think? why is this happening to me? I am too young to be losing my mind I want to do so many things in my life but what if I can't because I will lose it and be in some asylum somewhere for the rest of my life or on the streets or dead. I just need some comfort I need a hug and I need to be given hope again because I am losing it..I need to understand what is happening to me more I have weird thoughts I have paranoia that other people always know what is on my mind and that people are out to hurt me or ruin my self image I fear people attacking or killing me so I get nervous when I am alone it makes me not want to go outside anymore but I have to and it complicates me I do not like being around doctors so how will I be able to open up to a psychiatrist? I already don't trust most people well enough to open up in person to them which is why it is so easy to open up online... My question is what do I do? what direction do I take? I feel so lost...How do I tell my parents? why are these weird changes happening to me? and will I ever succeed in life? will I live past 17?

[Sometimes psychotic]

Well there. Is a lot of evidence that early intervention is preventative so I'd recommend seeing a psychiatrist right away. I don't think you'll end up in some asylum somewhere that hardy exists usually you're treated and released or even treated as outpatient. If you have trouble talking to a pdoc then write it all down to read or hand to them. I had some of these issues about three years ago but with medication it went away completely so there is hope.

[strawberrysnow]

That is good news please excuse my ignorance on the subject I don't know a lot about this stuff I just know what I have seen on tv or movies and I know that stuff isn't usually accurate I was really afraid I need to stop panicking I just feel the weight of the world on my shoulders right now. Maybe writing it down is a good idea It is so hard for me to talk about it outright becaue I get choked up on my words and too nervous to get it all out I can type away for hours about this stuff on here but It is the total opposite for me in real life. I am glad to hear that there is hope...It is hard to feel hopeful when things are going nuts over here for me I sure don't feel so hopeful but I feel a little bit better I just probably need someone to talk too I had to vent and let it all out or I was going to explode it actually felt SO good to write the above message and I usually don't like writing too much for too long but that felt good. thank you for reading it.

[A18793715]

With medication, you could be symptom free or they lower it enough that you can live a "normal" life. If you're worried about telling your parents or don't know how, you could always bring them into a psychiatrist appointment so the doctor can tell them and explain. It's not your fault. They released a study and found that 80%+ have markers in their DNA of schizophrenia. So for most people, you're born with it. It's nothing you did. Sometimes it happens young or in your mid to late 30's. Mine started at 13.
As for leading a successful life, I can't really answer. It depends on how you respond to medication (I don't respond to any). But that doesn't mean you cant learn how to live with everything. It's how I'm learning to live now. And of course you'll live past 17. I'm now 23, so it's been 10 years for me now.

Try not to worry too much. Lots of first diagnosed people imagine the stigma that schizophrenia is life ruining and we're all "out of our minds". You're a human just like everyone else on this planet. Don't let a diagnosis hurt you.

[insilence]

the hearing cortex is in the middle of the brain below the right/left hemispheres.
MENTALLY FEEL the top of the audio cortex, and pull away from the left/right hemispheres on each side, and back of hearing cortex.
you will notice a click and the sounds should recede.

also do this with the pineal gland, FEEL the LOWER pineal and pull down using your mind as a muscle flexing would.

then pull away the back of the brains audio cortex.

post if it works for you, others need hope.