Roll Call 96

What did the mail carrier do? Freak cause it had a battery in it?

I love it so far! Much better than listening to loudspeakers on my phone or laptop in the bedroom.

They gave my dad fri sat and sun off but he has to work the whole next week with no days off

i am possibly facing homeless at this point...
my parents told me that they are tired of "supporting" me... they want me to be "independent" because i was complaining that they never give me the chance to live my own life...

my mom went through my texts and i was really pissed off because it was a major violation of my privacy and i felt really upset when she did that, then she found out that i was flirting with this guy and hinting at the idea that me and him would have sex and she freaked out, called me a slut and said that i needed to have sex only after marriage. but i dont want to get married and she thinks that means i am going to hell......

so now, my parents (mostly my dad) decided that i am not going to live with them anymore and that i need to find my own place before our house sells or i will be homeless.

I've done too much stimulants. Now I don't care anymore. I wanted to go to school and get a job and have a life but my motivation is dead. Dopamine dysregulation. All I want to do is lay down and do nothing I don't care anymore. Even the serotonin stimulant didn't make me happy.

My positive schizophrenia symptoms are fine but the negative symptoms are way worse and I didn't even think about the negative symptoms.

I have to go to work tomorrow for 9 hours. I feel exhausted.

I didn't sleep last night. I just layed there scratching my skin because I decided to drink some water for once so the toxins can build up and thinking about life.

Yesterday, smoking medical weed made me realize that I'm really depressed and it's because that's just how I am that's my personality now not like when before I was depressed. Nothing gets me high anymore. Nothing makes me happy anymore. Why do good people die, why do people hate, etc. That's a part of the reason I hate life. And I have to try to defend myself from people for what?

I analyse the truth and I don't want to be fake. But the truth is sometimes something that I don't want to understand. And that's the point =[

I'm such a good person to other people and life but that comes with this curse.

Can films trigger psychotic thoughts if they're related to delusions?

My Marshall amp bluetooth speaker. Its huge!

that is huge is that what you use to listen to you music on your iphone?

Did she say why she was making those changes? Having to wait for prescriptions is not fun. I hope you'll have good luck with the changes.

Thank you! She is changing me from Abilify to Invega because the Abilify is only lasting half a month before I start having break through hallucinations so she wants me to try something stronger. We talked about a goal of getter by on Invega Sustenna but I need to be on the pills first to make sure I'm not allergic, etc. As far as the Lunesta goes my Ambien had only been working half way I was waking up a lot still when taking it. And as far as the propranolol I needed something for tremors and my heart rate has been elevated my last 5 appointments she said so she wants to lower it some.

I talked to my doctor and she is filling out the paperwork for my Invega now so hopefully I'll have it by early next week.

Oh, OK, yes, I hope the changes will work better. Everytime I went to that crappy hospital, they'd change my ap and add ad, etc. It was like just a whim, and to have a pissing contest between the pdoc's. So in my case I'm skeptical.

You had a pissing contest with your pdoc???

No, the pdoc's had then with each other. My pdoc at the clinic, with the ones at the hospital.

Thats gross

It's a figure of speech, newtus. They didn't literally pee in a contest.