Roll Call 135

Grocery store? Just buy something small like a candy bar or something else you consider a treat, like for me I don’t enjoy driving to the store so I allow myself some flowers as a treat when I do drive there....it helps to have a positive association.....

I wish I had a jar of fluff......

Its weird cuz when i was in my major psychosis i went to the grocery every afternoon and picked up a newspaper. For like a year or two.

Actually I drove a lot during and just after my psychosis but I was randomly speeding etc probably hypo or manic at the time.

Ugh just feeling terrible

I was very active too during my major psychosis, I could walk for hours and didn’t feel tired, following whatever ideas my delusional brain had. I’d be working from 7 AM until 7 PM, then instead of going home I’d walk around town (by foot) until midnight. I didn’t feel sick like I do now, I felt very healthy and full of energy.

What happens?

Me too! I felt healthy and everything! Now i feel physically sick all the time and extremely low energy.

The energy when i was sick, was made me what stop my medications.

When I see my doctor on Thursday I'm going to ask about getting on Trazodone

Trazodone made me feel high. It was weird.

I was on it a very long time ago but don't remember much about it

Im bored yall lol

I was talking to my cog rehab specialist about whether I belive I’m bipolar or not....now I totally agree with the psychosis part but I just don’t buy the bipolar part, I think it’s convenient to treat me like that so I can easily get the right meds etc. I think I’d call it psychosis NOS but that’s just me. Do you guys think your dx is valid?

I do. But then i dont.

I do because i still get voices and once in a blue moon a small delusion.

But i dont because ive recovered so much that that stuff isnt on a regular basis anymore. But im not bipolar either i dont think. I dont really get mania.

If anything i have severe depression and severe anxiety, maybe agoraphobia.

But if i stop my meds i might be right back where i was 4 years ago. So idk.

I don't think any of them fit me, except for the sz, but that's complicated.

Yes for the C-PTSD one, no to the Schizoaffective one. Psychosis can stem from many illness right? I just don’t know yet how to explain my manic episode though..

And aren’t they change the definition of every Dx every now and then? I just feel like those experts can’t really explain about MI fully yet.

Yeah I mean if you look at the big pic everyone’s genetics are different so they think sz could be like 40 different illnesses.....

my dx of schizoaffective bipolar seems accurate for how I've been for almost 10 years, possibly longer. I was first diagnosed with major depressive disorder after a suicide attempt and wasn't diagnosed with bipolar until 18 when things started getting really out of control then they changed it to schizoaffective a year later because it seemed more accurate since the psychotic episodes were happening outside of the mood episodes of mania and depression. It's been my dx ever since, I feel it fits, my doctors I've had seem to. Sometimes I have long periods of remission and sometimes I have times where I'm completely out of my mind (which hasn't happened in awhile, thankfully) and everything in between.

I personally don't feel like diagnosis matters as long as you're getting the right treatment that is helpful to you

Oops, the general anxiety and the major depression sort of fit but that's complicated too. I think all of the medical dx's are due to having been drinking alcohol with massive daily amounts of benzos. Now that I'm not on a benzo anymore (except for the very occasional Ativan) most of the dx's are no longer a problem. But the personality disorders are more of a problem for me. If someone only has traits, they shouldn't be damned with cluster b personality disorders.

Has anyone heard from pattycake?

I see. I really hope they will soon confirm about the genetics factor in mental illness, and not just as “one of the theories”. I’m so sick of people treating people with MI unlike they treat people with physical illness.

I was wondering where she was too

No, and I’ve been wondering about Zoloft Haver too.