Roll Call 160!

Job 30 26 · Feb 03, 2020, 09:28 PM

I've gone zero days without making a mistake on twitter today. I need to stay away that sight. I apologized, and removed the tweets, and the whole deal, then I unfollowed her so it would never happen again, then she kept on tweeting about it. I need to stay away from alcohol while I tweet people. I didn't see t the way she saw it. O well.

Job 30 26 · Feb 03, 2020, 09:31 PM

"Im only human, I'd have to ask you out, you look like a goddess! You'd say no, but statistically speaking, someone is bound to say yes because I've been told no to, too many times.."

Since when is it sexual to ask a person out and complement their hair? I thought it was self-deprecating. And even more importantly, I apologized! and she's still tweeting about it.

Job 30 26 · Feb 03, 2020, 09:32 PM

I'm a hopeless case people

Job 30 26 · Feb 03, 2020, 09:40 PM

Anyways, I saw my psychologist but it went too quickly. I've never had a session go this quick. I've been upset a lot because people know too much about me, and I feel like my reputation is like water running through my fingers, at least in my home town.

I need to ask him more questions, this time I talked for quite some time. I did ask him one question that was important, I asked him how I can stop public shaming, and If I can be upset when people throw shade my way. The psychology involved frames how I should view it emotionally.

Blue_Bird · Feb 03, 2020, 10:17 PM

I’m so hyped up from today I don’t think I’ll be able to get to sleep tonight

Job 30 26 · Feb 03, 2020, 10:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I’m so hyped up from today I don’t think I’ll be able to get to sleep tonight

I lay in the bed, and make my pillow cover one of my eyes to help me ease into sleep better. SP gave a great suggestion by saying turn off blue light, and I dim my laptop screen all the way too.

newtus · Feb 03, 2020, 11:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Job 30 26

I lay in the bed, and make my pillow cover one of my eyes to help me ease into sleep better. SP gave a great suggestion by saying turn off blue light, and I dim my laptop screen all the way too.

I just wrote something pretty great on my blog. It’s a bit philosophical. Go check it out! The Dopamine Flux is my blog name. I don’t think I’m allowed to link it here.

Desoxyn · Feb 03, 2020, 11:17 PM

I'm burnt out guys. I need a break.

newtus · Feb 03, 2020, 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I'm burnt out guys. I need a break.

Go ahead. Take a break. Take care of yourself. Break out the self-care!

Desoxyn · Feb 03, 2020, 11:24 PM

I feel like hiding in my Te and let everything that everyone thinks get to me and be upset and lazy

But I have to keep pushing forward. It's just hard because of my meds.. They aren't fully tweaked yet.

Desoxyn · Feb 03, 2020, 11:27 PM

I might sit with my mom and watch tv. That's all I feel like doing. Or watch youtube or netflix.

Erti · Feb 03, 2020, 11:43 PM

Hey guys

Erti · Feb 04, 2020, 12:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I might sit with my mom and watch tv. That's all I feel like doing. Or watch youtube or netflix.

Hey tweaky. Hope you’re doing alright right now.

Desoxyn · Feb 04, 2020, 12:19 AM

I'm feeling a bit depressed about my life even though I'm on phenibut. I might play xbox or ps4 all night.

Erti · Feb 04, 2020, 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I'm feeling a bit depressed about my life even though I'm on phenibut. I might play xbox or ps4 all night.

Well I hope You get to feeling better or something. Depression is something that I wish on no one (besides maybe seriously bad people like murder era and ****)

Desoxyn · Feb 04, 2020, 12:23 AM

At least I'm gonna have a job again so I don't feel as bad for doing this. It's ok to do this after doing attempted entrepreneur things for months right? Like why can't society give me a break.

I'm never judging anyone for playing video games ever again.

Erti · Feb 04, 2020, 12:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

At least I'm gonna have a job again so I don't feel as bad for doing this. It's ok to do this after doing attempted entrepreneur things for months right? Like why can't society give me a break.

I'm never judging anyone for playing video games ever again.

Yeah video games for a lot of people help with mental illnesses of many sorts. I’ve been video gaming more myself. Since my birthday is coming up I may be getting a PS4 with the birthday money and a few monies I saved myself.

Desoxyn · Feb 04, 2020, 12:32 AM

God I didn't realize how much pressure I was putting on myself until now.

I've been putting 100 times more pressure on myself than I thought I was..

Desoxyn · Feb 04, 2020, 12:34 AM

Cuz I don't want to go back to how I was before psychedelics. They made me change.. But they are pushing me too hard.. Making me too hard on myself..

Psychedelics don't really love me

Erti · Feb 04, 2020, 12:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

God I didn't realize how much pressure I was putting on myself until now.

I've been putting 100 times more pressure on myself than I thought I was..

I think we’ve all done that sometimes and not realize it. Under pressure song by queen comes to mind.

Erti · Feb 04, 2020, 12:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

Cuz I don't want to go back to how I was before psychedelics. They made me change.. But they are pushing me too hard.. Making me too hard on myself..

Psychedelics don't really love me

Psychedelics aren’t for everyone but from many people I hear about it giving people a spiritual experience.

Desoxyn · Feb 04, 2020, 12:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Erti

I think we’ve all done that sometimes and not realize it. Under pressure song by queen comes to mind.

I just need to rest right now. Everyone loves me and says I'm a great person and good etc etc .. But it's because I've been working so hard on myself. Remember me? Snorting meth off of private parts of people? I go to not giving a **** to completely hard on myself.

I need to find balance and I think playing video games would help me really relax. I should buy a nice tv and play online with people - Just to de-stress.

Erti · Feb 04, 2020, 12:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

I just need to rest right now. Everyone loves me and says I'm a great person and good etc etc .. But it's because I've been working so hard on myself. Remember me? Snorting meth off of private parts of people? I go to not giving a **** to completely hard on myself.

I need to find balance and I think playing video games would help me really relax. I should buy a nice tv and play online with people - Just to de-stress.

Well a lot of that was probably the drugs making you not give a ****. ThatÂ’s why a lot of people do drugs. To not give a **** about life or to survive a mind that self hates and self destruct.