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  #1  
Old May 08, 2021, 07:58 AM
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Good day all! Last thread went over 1,000!

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  #2  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:01 AM
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Getting new psychiatrist on Monday I'm pretty sure. As long as they can fit me in. Pdocs are super busy these days I take it. Understandable, but still frustrating when they can't fit you in...
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  #3  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:03 AM
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So I fell asleep finally after 2am and woke up at 7am. Five hours isn’t that great though for me. Especially seeing as it’s Saturday and I could afford to sleep in.

I am adjusting to a higher dose of Latuda so that could be it. I just hope it settles down soon.

I was getting anxious before so I switched to green tea from coffee and it’s helping my anxiety but not much else.

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Old May 08, 2021, 08:04 AM
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Sleep is one of those things I cannot do without. I always just feel horrendous the next day if I sleep poorly. I can certainly tell when I am lacking it. What helps me is meditation. It might not sound like it would help, but it helps me. I don't know if that's something you've tried?
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  #5  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:06 AM
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Also there's some book Arianna Huffington wrote about sleep. It might be an autobiography or something - I haven't read it - but I think it talks about sleep. If you're interested, check out articles and/or books on sleep.
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  #6  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:09 AM
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I’m really just not having a good day.

I swear it’s always something

And I always continually feel like a burden to everyyyyone around me. That’s why I just wanna isolate from people. I really do. I always gotta hear it from my parents or my friends never have time for me due to their personal lives, fiancé is like a loner, and I’m just done.

Not only can I never do anything right... idk it’s always something. Always someone getting mad at me for how I’m living my life. I don’t understand what I’m doing so wrong other than maybe financial issues.

Like my moms always on my butt about my weight and health and my dad comes over and he’s like “you need to clean more and clean better. Men don’t like a dirty house”. And so much more of the comments from my mom about my weight, health, my money situation, my religious beliefs even tho they are the same as hers basically, like a shyt ton of stuff. And then my dad, I love him to death, but I gotta hear about how “men don’t like when women...” this and that and this and that. I feel so fckn inadequate as a woman and a person. But I know he’s had relationship troubles his whole life and he doesn’t want me to get hurt by a man/person/anyone. Idk.

Fiancé is always stressed out and doesn’t talk much.

My friends are stressed to hell right now. SP and Door.

I can’t see my therapist cuz I’m starting this job and she has no openings for me right now for a long while.

Like I’m so fckn sad and torn, mentally.

Like please someone help rescue me from life. Fckkk.
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  #7  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:09 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus View Post
Sleep is one of those things I cannot do without. I always just feel horrendous the next day if I sleep poorly. I can certainly tell when I am lacking it. What helps me is meditation. It might not sound like it would help, but it helps me. I don't know if that's something you've tried?

I’ve tried before and it was so awkward and didn’t work for me. Sometimes listening to the sound of waves helps me though.

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  #8  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:12 AM
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I was at a greenhouse yesterday and I heard this demonic voice say ‘EVERYBODY HATES YOU’ so that freaked me out. That along with seeing the shadow figure earlier.

Good thing I got some sleep.

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  #9  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:24 AM
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I’m not using the treadmill today. I just don’t feel like it. I’ll do it when I’m better rested and in a better state of mind.

I’m essentially going to read until tonight then attempt to get some damn sleep. I’m tired but wired feeling

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  #10  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:27 AM
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I almost miss Thorazine at this point

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  #11  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:34 AM
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I was watching this show yesterday and one of the characters mom had cancer and she was dying. I started crying like crazy, like really full on sobbing, I couldn’t stop. My mom died from leukemia and it just reminded me of her, and I also feel guilty because I wasn’t at the hospital with her when she died. I was at our home. I was with her in the hospital the previous times she was on a ventilator and things like that, but the one time I really wish I was with her I wasn’t. I got a phone call and I thought it was her but it was the doctor calling to say she died

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  #12  
Old May 08, 2021, 08:45 AM
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I hope it’s not the abilify doing this to me, the not sleeping and spending ridiculous amounts of money

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  #13  
Old May 08, 2021, 09:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue_Bird View Post
I was watching this show yesterday and one of the characters mom had cancer and she was dying. I started crying like crazy, like really full on sobbing, I couldn’t stop. My mom died from leukemia and it just reminded me of her, and I also feel guilty because I wasn’t at the hospital with her when she died. I was at our home. I was with her in the hospital the previous times she was on a ventilator and things like that, but the one time I really wish I was with her I wasn’t. I got a phone call and I thought it was her but it was the doctor calling to say she died

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I’m sorry to hear Roll Call 184 How does the loss of your mom affect you in your daily life?
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  #14  
Old May 08, 2021, 09:26 AM
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I hope it’s not the abilify doing this to me, the not sleeping and spending ridiculous amounts of money

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I was about to say, you seem to have some mania but idk I could be wrong
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  #15  
Old May 08, 2021, 09:36 AM
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Idk about yall but everyday that I’m alive I’m so upset that I deal with mental illness. Like I hate having to wake up and realize all over again that I’m sick and need meds.
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  #16  
Old May 08, 2021, 09:41 AM
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I feel like I’m being sabotaged by everyone on fb
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  #17  
Old May 08, 2021, 09:45 AM
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I haven’t eaten in over a day and a half. All because I was sick yesterday from the shot and I don’t have food really because our power was out.
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  #18  
Old May 08, 2021, 09:58 AM
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I’m so exhausted from all these bureaucracy stuff. Beyond exhausted.
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  #19  
Old May 08, 2021, 10:00 AM
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Roll Call 184

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  #20  
Old May 08, 2021, 10:03 AM
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Roll Call 184

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I like that. Idk why but I like it so much
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  #21  
Old May 08, 2021, 10:09 AM
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That painting brings a calming feeling, SP. I really like that one 💕
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  #22  
Old May 08, 2021, 10:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
I’m really just not having a good day.

I swear it’s always something

And I always continually feel like a burden to everyyyyone around me. That’s why I just wanna isolate from people. I really do. I always gotta hear it from my parents or my friends never have time for me due to their personal lives, fiancé is like a loner, and I’m just done.

Not only can I never do anything right... idk it’s always something. Always someone getting mad at me for how I’m living my life. I don’t understand what I’m doing so wrong other than maybe financial issues.

Like my moms always on my butt about my weight and health and my dad comes over and he’s like “you need to clean more and clean better. Men don’t like a dirty house”. And so much more of the comments from my mom about my weight, health, my money situation, my religious beliefs even tho they are the same as hers basically, like a shyt ton of stuff. And then my dad, I love him to death, but I gotta hear about how “men don’t like when women...” this and that and this and that. I feel so fckn inadequate as a woman and a person. But I know he’s had relationship troubles his whole life and he doesn’t want me to get hurt by a man/person/anyone. Idk.

Fiancé is always stressed out and doesn’t talk much.

My friends are stressed to hell right now. SP and Door.

I can’t see my therapist cuz I’m starting this job and she has no openings for me right now for a long while.

Like I’m so fckn sad and torn, mentally.

Like please someone help rescue me from life. Fckkk.
I’m stressed out too right now. I try my best to balance between doing what I need to do and self care. What I do is to take a few breaks each day. Set an alarm for 1-2 hours and until the alarm rings I forbid myself to think about heavy stuff and do a self care instead. My self care list:

Exercise is too much for me at the moment so I just take a short walk around the neighborhood.
Paint something simple that doesn’t require me to sit for hours trying to get it right.
Massaging myself with a massage oil. Then take a shower and wash my hair. Put on lotion and wear a comfortable clothes after that.
Play a simple game on my phone.
Watch funny animal videos or fun music concerts.
Play with my cats.
Order my favorite food (I just bought a cake today)
Decorate my room with flowers and aromatherapy is on almost all the time
And the last one I don’t recommend because it’s just me being weird, but I like doing chores. The smell of soap when doing dishes. Seeing my clothes are folded or hung up nicely in my closet. The feel of squeaky clean floor on my soles after I sweep and mop it. Etc. When I feel like I don’t have any control about things that happen in my life, I control my surroundings by doing all these chores. It gives me a sense of relief because there are at least things that I can control.

I don’t know if this will help you but stay strong, we got this
__________________
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and millions of butterflies 🌹🦋
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  #23  
Old May 08, 2021, 10:40 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 12AM View Post
I’m stressed out too right now. I try my best to balance between doing what I need to do and self care. What I do is to take a few breaks each day. Set an alarm for 1-2 hours and until the alarm rings I forbid myself to think about heavy stuff and do a self care instead. My self care list:


Exercise is too much for me at the moment so I just take a short walk around the neighborhood.

Paint something simple that doesn’t require me to sit for hours trying to get it right.

Massaging myself with a massage oil. Then take a shower and wash my hair. Put on lotion and wear a comfortable clothes after that.

Play a simple game on my phone.

Watch funny animal videos or fun music concerts.

Play with my cats.

Order my favorite food (I just bought a cake today)

Decorate my room with flowers and aromatherapy is on almost all the time

And the last one I don’t recommend because it’s just me being weird, but I like doing chores. The smell of soap when doing dishes. Seeing my clothes are folded or hung up nicely in my closet. The feel of squeaky clean floor on my soles after I sweep and mop it. Etc. When I feel like I don’t have any control about things that happen in my life, I control my surroundings by doing all these chores. It gives me a sense of relief because there are at least things that I can control.


I don’t know if this will help you but stay strong, we got this


Thank you so much Roll Call 184!!!
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  #24  
Old May 08, 2021, 10:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Blue_Bird View Post
I hope it’s not the abilify doing this to me, the not sleeping and spending ridiculous amounts of money

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Abilify made me have bad insomnia and restlessness
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  #25  
Old May 08, 2021, 10:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 12AM View Post
I’m stressed out too right now. I try my best to balance between doing what I need to do and self care. What I do is to take a few breaks each day. Set an alarm for 1-2 hours and until the alarm rings I forbid myself to think about heavy stuff and do a self care instead. My self care list:

Exercise is too much for me at the moment so I just take a short walk around the neighborhood.
Paint something simple that doesn’t require me to sit for hours trying to get it right.
Massaging myself with a massage oil. Then take a shower and wash my hair. Put on lotion and wear a comfortable clothes after that.
Play a simple game on my phone.
Watch funny animal videos or fun music concerts.
Play with my cats.
Order my favorite food (I just bought a cake today)
Decorate my room with flowers and aromatherapy is on almost all the time
And the last one I don’t recommend because it’s just me being weird, but I like doing chores. The smell of soap when doing dishes. Seeing my clothes are folded or hung up nicely in my closet. The feel of squeaky clean floor on my soles after I sweep and mop it. Etc. When I feel like I don’t have any control about things that happen in my life, I control my surroundings by doing all these chores. It gives me a sense of relief because there are at least things that I can control.

I don’t know if this will help you but stay strong, we got this

That’s an excellent idea Roll Call 184 I’ve never set a timer for self care or even thought about setting one but it’s just as Important so why not?

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