Roll Call 189

I always have these doubts about whether to switch therapists or not. I don't know why. It's just like my mind always operates on doubt mode. Any thoughts would be appreciated. My pdoc doesn't think I have adhd since I have not presented with issues getting schoolwork done (which is pretty much true). I never had problems in college getting focused, and when I did have trouble with focus, I solved the problems fairly easily.

The question that keeps coming up for me is - is life supposed to suck this much? (I know it's a relative question).

I used to run a lot on the treadmill, ever since I moved I haven't had access to a treadmill, thus, I don't run anymore because I don't feel like going to the gym. Anyway. I'm in kind of a rough place right now even though I am working. A lot of adjustments.

Those 40 extra hours per week I had to deal with my mental health were helpful. I'll just say that.

I hope you feel better. I like to walk a lot on the treadmill. The one on my floor of the building is currently not working last time I checked though which sucks because it's starting to get cold so I'm less likely to want to take long walks outside. I've never run on the treadmill before. I'm so uncoordinated I'd probably fall off if I tried to

Weren’t you tested for adhd....I mean I’m getting my work done but I have it, I just have to adjust my schedule and do it when I am actually having a little focus.

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Yeah I guess my pdoc just thinks since I didn't have trouble getting through college, I don't have adhd. Pretty faulty reasoning, in my opinion. And for the record, I did have trouble getting through college (due to psychosis and other things).

Having a bad panic attack

I think I’ll take a klonopin

Hugs BB..

I literally cannot stop taking pictures of my cat

I used my 23andMe dna test results in a genome sequencing thing and some things are interesting:
:
I have an above average genetic predisposition to: bipolar disorder, Autism spectrum disorders, anxiety,

98th percentile (very high genetic predisposition) to triple-negative- breast cancer

Very high genetic predisposition to breast cancer

High genetic predisposition to higher caffeine consumption (also I metabolize caffeine quicker)

Average genetic predisposition to Schizophrenia

High genetic predisposition to depression

Anorexia, I am 99th percentile, very high genetic predisposition

I got up early this morning to go to the gym.

I went to the gym this morning! Also, I am reducing Klonopin.

Keep drinking coffee and tea, I saw a study result saying people who drink 3 to 4 cups per day have a lower rate of dementia in older age.

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Three to five cups per day. They didn't specify how big a cup is.

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My knees hurt. I might have to go get a Coke soon.

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They don't bring the inhaler unless I'm telling them to.

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To me this is arrogance....he supposedly knows more than the actual scientific test?

God I'm mentally a vegetable this morning

Coffee.. Coffee,., kicking in.., coffee..

I got my new computer. I am pleased

Apple or Windows or Linux?

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Apple MacBook Pro M1 14"

My old one was like 10 years old. It was the old one that my dad gave me 5-6 years ago after he bought a new one. It worked well so I didn't need to buy my own computer which saved money ^-

And we’re happy about it! But seriously she’ll never be this little again take all the pics you want.

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Made the stuffing and Velveeta mac and cheese for tomorrow