Roll Call 190

I've been eating healthy/balanced lately without obsessing about weight. So I'm eating to be healthy not just lose weight. But I still sometimes eat things like French fries, etc in moderation but that's completely okay

I told my mom that I need exercise - Cuz I feel restless. She agrees - And we'll go skiing next week.

I work tomorrow =/

I've been reading a book called "Flow". I think that everything is a crystal. Snort that crystally stim that is reality! Get in a zone man...

My mom said to shovel snow - So I'll put on my ear buds, dress warmly and do that.

Edit: This is the book Flow
– HarperCollins

I wish I could go tobogganing.

I am going down on the K-pin. Wish me luck!

That sounds extremely fun!

This has been my sleep off Thorazine. I’m going back on it

Here's something I wrote about my own struggle:


I am getting stronger again. My mental state is getting better. I know I can get off of the Klonopin. I needed it for a while during a time in my life. Now I don't need it anymore. I feel my mind getting more resilient. My body, too. I have what it takes to counteract the negative thoughts I get. I can choose from a variety of tools I have to fight anxiety. I am becoming more conscious.

My God BB!! Stay strong. You need your sleep. Take the thorazine..

I like zopiclone and have been taking it for ~2 years. I take 3.75mg at night - I used to take 7.5mg but I only need half. I sleep 10-12 hours a night (Solid deep REM sleep).

They don't have zopiclone where you live, but they have LUNESTA...... It's eszopiclone 3mg.

I started with Seroquel 50mg because I used to laugh myself to sleep for 2-3 hours every night but it started giving me heart palps.

Going to make white chicken chili today.....

Slow-Cooker White Chicken Chili Recipe Recipe | Epicurious

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The chili is in the crock takes four more hours though, we’re getting Chinese for lunch....this will be dinner.

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Sounds delicious SP!

Chinese for lunch sounds good too. I'm hungry. I'm going to have leftover green chicken enchiladas for lunch.

Feeling kind of crappy again. I don't want to contract with my T (I did last night but it expired at 9 AM) right now but we'll see I might have to later. Audio hallucinations last night. Sounds about right!

Sorry sk....what are you doing for you? I know you’re getting the sketches and that should help but if your at work can you take a break and make it about you....not just something passive like rest or surfing the Net but do something like play a game or color and have a snack or lunch you enjoy...maybe some nice music too? My bf always goes to the car for his lunch break so he can chill with music or a phone call.

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Wonderful Suggestions, SP.

Maybe I will take a break and walk over to the store next to work and get a doughnut or something. The fresh air might do me good and I feel the need for CARBS!

I went for the sweet and sour chicken...normally I’d get something healthier but sometimes you’ve gotta indulge.

I love sweet and sour chicken. That and general Tso’s are my favorite main dishes to order from Chinese restaurants.

Really enjoying my time off school....so relaxed but starting to feel more motivated now. Based on the book finding your unicorn space I realized I need creative expression that is separate from work....I signed up for a book on ikebana which is a type of flower arrangement.

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Yep they are super good....I like the general tso’s and orange chicken too among the fried but normally I get beef or chicken and broccoli which is just sautéed. How was your sleep last night?

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It was zero degrees this morning.....I haven’t been outside and have no plans to.

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Wow!!!!! That's cold!

Oh yeah I forgot about orange chicken I love that too. I love putting red pepper flakes on it so it’s sweet and spicy at the same time.

Chicken/beef and broccoli is really good too, I haven’t had that in a long time. Maybe I’ll get some next time I order Chinese.

I slept all through last night and took a couple naps today as well. It was a lot but I think I needed it based on how bad my sleep has been the past week so I’m back on Thorazine but at a lower dose, instead of 200mg I’m on 100mg now which seems to be a perfect dose for me.

Orange chicken is my favorite but I only get it occasionally. I had it last time I had Chinese food though.

My T texted me back. That was nice.