[vrba44070]

Hi, I'm new to this area of psych central. I don't know why I didn't visit earlier, because I have bipolar disorder with psychotic features. I see things out of the corner of my eyes & hear commands. I'm on two antipsycotics, geodon & navane. The other day heard a command to stop eating, but I ignored it. The drugs help me to do that. Well I did stop eating for a while, but then I ignored it.
Is anyone else here bipolar w/ psycotic features? I get paranoid as well & think people are out to get me. I get to a point where I can't finish sentences. I don't know why i'm not considered schizoaffective, but my pdoc has mentioned it.
I know it's not normal, but it seems so natural at first. Then the voices get nasty.
I hope I can get some support here.
I guess I should tell my pdoc about the command, but it was only one & I already called him about being depressed. I hate to bother him again. I'm seeing my therapist Monday; I'll tell her.

[deliquesce]

please do tell your therapist. when do you get to see your pdoc next?

"i know it's not normal, but it seems so natural at first" -- i completely relate. my voices have never got nasty, though. sometimes they have scared me, because they seem threatening/sinister, but if i tell them to go away, then they do.

[vrba44070]

I see my pdoc Jan 30. I may be able to get in sooner. It depends on what my therapist says.
Thank you for asking.

[vrba44070]

I went to therapy today & doidn't tell her about the commands. I guess I should have, but I see her again Wednesday. I'm dealing with a lot of stuff right now & wanted to wait & process What I need to process. I hear a command that tells me not to eat, but I ignore it. So I'm not in too much trouble.
Thank you everyone who replied. I will post more in this forum because it relates to me. If you think i should call my pdoc let me know.

[deliquesce]

i think you are doing your best in a difficult situation, vrba .

i'd encourage you to tell your T on Wednesday, but i understand needing to process it by yourself first. i am concerned that the voices tell you to do things that aren't in your best interests (e.g. not eating), but i'm glad you're able to fight them and do what you know is best.

i think if it gets difficult for you to keep fighting this alone, then maybe a call to your pdoc would be a good idea. my pdoc says my voices are not anything to worry about (but then, i don't hear commands, just conversations) but he has given me some antipsychotics to take if i find them difficult to control.

[vrba44070]

I've lost quite a bit of weight. It was necessary. I really need to talk to my therapist about this. I just don't want my antipsychotics increased. I'm already having restlessness & other side effects because of them. I lost 2 more lbs this week. Not much, but still losing. I don't eat during the day, but when my husbands around at night I eat dinner.

[deliquesce]

i think you should tell your pdoc and your therapist. sooner, rather than later. i think this is an instance in which it would be good for you to call your pdoc, rather than wait for your next appt.

when i told my pdoc about my hallucinations he did not increase the antipsychotic. just pointed out that it is available if i want some quick relief. we talked about how i could deal with them just using my own thoughts, i found it very helpful.

[vrba44070]

I called my pdoc & he wants to see me tomorrow morning. I hope this goes okay. I don't want to go to the hospital again. Thank you for your advice.

[deliquesce]

(((vrba)))

i hope it goes okay too!! good luck, and please keep us posted if you can .

[vrba44070]

I just spent 6 days in the hospital. I feel much better now. I don't hear any commands. I'm on Invega now.

[deliquesce]

thanks for coming back to let us know how you are going - i was wondering where you had got to!

glad to hear that the hospital stay helped. you've been really brave doing this.