[carcinogen]

I am still new to this forum and haven't been back since I first signed up a few months back. Things were looking up, as I had made my way into a Pharmacy Tech class and things there were good. I was acing my first four tests and making my way through a difficult class. Then it started.... I failed my fifth test and it hit me like it always does when things hiccup on me. My mind started telling me I was stupid and pointless and couldn't survive in this class. I passed my next test with a 95 as I fought my way through the muck and mire of my mental torture. Test 7 came back with a 60 another failure. I buckled down and studied HARD for test #8 and failed again. This test I thought I knew inside out. It tore me up inside and now I am facing a failing grade with no motivation to try. I gave up inside as I always do.

No matter how hard I try I fail. I have one test on the 25th and then the final the monday after and If I don't ace both of them I fail the class. But I can't even open the book right now. Self fulfilling prophecy, I know, but it doesn't change things.

Hello, carcinogen.

http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/15-...e-distortions/
http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/fix...e-distortions/
http://psychcentral.com/blog/archive...nking-hurt-us/
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...-part-the-cure
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...-part-the-cure
http://www.psychologytoday.com/print/48485

Sit down where you generally study and open a book. Promise yourself you will at least page through the relevant material for at least fifteen minutes. Before getting up, spend ten minutes writing out what you remember. After an hour or two do it again.

Breakdown what you need to do into manageable segments. You already know you can do the work. The majority of tests confirm what you know.

Berating yourself is unhelpful. Would it be helpful to talk to your teacher to see if you are entitled to an accommodation? Perhaps the teacher might know someone who would be agreeable to tutoring you. The idea is to think of ways to accomplish your goals rather than to focus on the negative stuff that is so devastating.

For more on accommodations, ASK A JAN CONSULTANT

[madisgram]

off topic---oops. byz i thought you might mean me !!!! i know, it's all about me.
hey, that's a good site.

[Okami]

It can be hard to get through such things sometimes when you're sure that everything you're doing is a complete and utter failed attempt. However, sometimes, I've found that when I start to really roll downhill in classes and drop to sickening lows, I just reset.

Meaning, if a test comes back at 43% (which believe me, it has. Haha) I simply back away and tell myself to forget this one and start new and prepare heavily for the next. No matter how hopeless the situation seems. Its never over until its officially over. So I'll work up to the next test without the anxiety of a previous failure looming over me. Just allow myself to 'start again' mentally. Because lets face it. Mistakes in the past are made. The only real thing that can change the future is working hard to make it right in the present.

So instead of putting any energy into gloom and doom about how bad it all looks. Just don't do the math. Don't look back. Don't add it up. Simply focus ahead and shoot for the best damn grade you can get on the next two tests. You know you can do it. You've already proved it by doing it countless times before. You're capable, now go do it. ♥

Carcinogen,

I just wanted to say that just because you fail it does not make you a failure. School is difficult and sometimes there are teachers that throw curve balls. i have always found that if I attend the lecture and take copious notes that i do alright on the test. I wish you all the best and hope that you ace these next couple tests.

Love and hugs,
Tara