[DistractableArtist]

Hey everyone, I'm new here.... Was referred to this website by my friend.

I just wanted to talk a bit I guess about myself and school...

Well, first off, I go to the 2nd best school in Washington state, and it's a LOT of hard work... it's pretty much a college prep school and I'm in my Sophomore year, and already it's so much harder than last year..
Other students agree, but I'm having so much trouble when it comes to focusing.
I can't focus on anything that's even remotely boring to me. I'm a very slow reader, as often when I read(unless I'm interested in the subject) I am looking at the words, but not absorbing what they're supposed to be meaning.
I'm not very comfortable around the 'normal' people in my school, and I'm more comfortable with the 'weirdos' I guess. I have a group of 3 friends that I'm the most comfortable around, so at least I've got them..

One thing that's been a lot of trouble for me is that I, apparently, have very sensitive hearing. The sound of people eating or whatever just bugs the carp out of me. People will often snack during classes they are allowed to, and I'm uncomfortably close to a couple people in one of my classes and BOTH of them eat during that class, so it's like having a dagger dug into each ear. It's incredibly uncomfortable, and I can't help but stab my pencil into my binder and bite my tongue, trying to hold it together.

Another thing is my motivation... I don't feel much motivation towards school, and I think the main thing keeping me trying as hard as I do is the guilt I feel if I don't. I feel guilty if my parents comment on a bad grade(I'm not doing the best in history since I can't focus on it) and then I get frustrated with them and myself, and retreat back to my room, to my computer, to my music.

I'm having a hard time seeing this school year going well since it's JUST started and already I'm sick of it and dreading having to get up for school 4 times a week(yeah, only 4 times, but that's because the work is so hard, we get one day off for homework and whatever else we need to do).

I dunno... My dad's out of work and my mom just works for our church, but nothing major, so we don't have health insurance, and money's tight, so there's no way we can go to the doctors for appointments, diagnostics, ect.,...

But I know that mental health problems, addiction, and other sort of problems like that run in my mom's side of my family....

Ahhg... I don't know. I don't think I'm being lazy, I just can't get motivated to start working on anything that's not due within 1 day. I've got 2 papers to write, one due next Monday and the other due at the end of October(with 3 other papers I'll have to write).

I just feel like it'd be so much easier just to stay home and work on my art, and my animals. (I'm a Crested Gecko breeder, even though I'm only just a few months from being 16)
School's such a pain, and I don't even know what I want to major in, but I think I'm not going to be 'normal' with my Junior year of school and attend Running Start, or, a way I can do college classes that count for both my highschool and college credits through my community college. That way when I finish highschool, I should have my AA also.
As I type this, I have no enthusiasm about it. I honestly don't care right now and would rather focus on things like music, art, and animals rather than school.

I should probably set up an appointment with the school counselor or something, but I think she's pretty booked being in only 1-2 days a week and stuff. Plus, I'm too embarrassed I think to talk about this stuff, let alone tell my parents I've got an appointment with a school counselor. *big sigh*

Anyway, it's getting late and I've got school tomorrow(yeee...-_-) so I suppose I should try to get some sleep.
(oh, and I might add, I've sort of suspect I have ADD and OCD, possibly high-functioning Aspergers(that one I'm skeptical, but I do share a lot of the symptoms) I don't want to go around labeling myself though since I don't have a professional diagnostic)

Oh, and you can call me Mel, if you want. >< Hi, Psychcentral!
And, goodnight!

i hope that year gets better for you.

was not really that good at school either- i didon't get anything higher than an F, so i know all the stresses of school

though i do like my history so if i can help with that then PM me- depending on what history it is

[DistractableArtist]

Luckily feeling guilty about the thought of not doing things for school has kept my grades over a C. I have 1 C in history though(world studies).

My favourite classes are definitely Spanish and Biology though.

[Miswimmy1]

Hey mel

What school? I live in Washington state as well and am a student. I have add and OCD so if u ever wanna talk to someone, message me!

[DistractableArtist]

Hi,

the school I go to is CAM Academy down in Battle Ground, Clark County.

I'm still having problems with school. I have a bunch of stuff due Monday, but I can't get myself to work on it. *sigh* My mind just doesn't want to focus and work on it. It's like, my mind is making it physically impossible to do this stuff. I rather go play outside, work on my project(building an Arc Reactor from Iron Man), play with my pets, or draw, or just surf the internet. Anything than sitting/settling down to work on my paper(well, I should probably start on 1 of 4 that are due by October 23) and looooonnnnggg boring chapter of History. Maybe I'll just start with getting my geometry finished and make my Spanish flashcards.... at least those are actually more or less easy/interesting

[Miswimmy1]

im sorry things are difficult. maybe you can chunk it out? (eg half hr spanish, half hr essays, half hr math, etc?) that way you can use the things you like to do as a motivation and you know that you wont have to sit and do the boring things for too long?