[Fluffy47323]

I've been bullied this year, but that's not what I really care about. My friend has been bullied a lot this year, and she has gone through a lot. Her mother passed away, her brother smokes pot, her dad is always working, and she has bad asthma. She really worries me because she is the amazing kind of person that always has a smile on her face. She is almost failing the school year because she is basically missing school months at a time. I am the person who feels their friends pain without trying, so it's affecting me as well as her. What do I doooo?

[lynn P.]

HI Fluffy47323 - sorry you and your friend are being bullied and sorry your friend has lost her mother plus all the other family issues. You are a nice friend to feel empathy for her. Does your school have counselors? If yes I would encourage your friend to speak to the counselor about the bullying and she also needs support from the loss of her mother plus the other family issues.

I have teenage daughters and bullying is a complex issues and not just one way to deal with it. One thing I I taught my kids is how to be assertive and to get adult help if their own solutions haven't worked. Sometimes ignoring helps but other times assertiveness helps....its a careful balancing act. Since you're a caring person, you also have to take care of yourself and know you can't always fix things for others. This doesn't mean you should stop caring though.

If this bullying is also online, advise her not to respond because this fuels the fire, but she should keep a copy of the bullying. The best thing is to encourage her to get help from the counselor. I hope all gets better soon.

[Fluffy47323]

Originally Posted by lynn P.

HI Fluffy47323 - sorry you and your friend are being bullied and sorry your friend has lost her mother plus all the other family issues. You are a nice friend to feel empathy for her. Does your school have counselors? If yes I would encourage your friend to speak to the counselor about the bullying and she also needs support from the loss of her mother plus the other family issues.

I have teenage daughters and bullying is a complex issues and not just one way to deal with it. One thing I I taught my kids is how to be assertive and to get adult help if their own solutions haven't worked. Sometimes ignoring helps but other times assertiveness helps....its a careful balancing act. Since you're a caring person, you also have to take care of yourself and know you can't always fix things for others. This doesn't mean you should stop caring though.

If this bullying is also online, advise her not to respond because this fuels the fire, but she should keep a copy of the bullying. The best thing is to encourage her to get help from the counselor. I hope all gets better soon.

Thank you. I'm sure this will help

[Nightworld1066]

Hey fluffy
I would encourage your friend to speak to a trusted teacher she trusts and that way it be resolved
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[alicetailor]

Hi fluffy,
Ok, first of all you have to remember, this is about her, not you. You're a good friend but now is not the time to sulk and lament. Help her get up on her feet and use your understanding of her to the advantage of the task ahead. Help her find happiness, not by being protective but by seeing to it that she indulges in activities that make her happy.
Good luck and may the force be with you.

Hello, Fluffy47323. I am sorry to hear what you and your friend are dealing with. It is great that you are so caring for your friend.

I think you should look into speaking with a counselor at the school. This is a great resource that can help immensely. With both the bullying as well as your friends home life problems.

Try and stay strong, your friend will benefit from it!