[winterglen]

I really screwed up badly, and now I have to leave a job that I love because of my horrible behavior.

It's been years since I've tried applying for a job. I don't know how I'll ever get one. I'm basically too stupid and too unreliable to work anywhere.

Oh, and I need to find one without my parents finding out because they'll constantly nag me about not trying hard enough or doing enough to get one.

I don't even know how to pretend to have skills to offer any employer.

I wish I were a perfectionist so that I'd have all of these skills and qualifications I need and I would be confident and say the right things and get in and do my job so well that everyone will be impressed and no one would ever criticize me or say I'm not good enough.

[gayleggg]

Just be persistant about putting in applications because the more you put in the better your chances are of getting responses. I'm sure you must have some skills if you have been working. Just think about what you did at that job and detail all the things you did and can do. Good luck

[healingme4me]

Even perfectionists struggle. Are you becoming unemployed against your desires, or just having a rough patch, at work?
Can you utilize resources,,at unemployment, for retraining?

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[SeekerOfLife]

Unemployment is hard when you also struggle with self esteem (as I do). Job offices often have short term classes to help you get a job. Myself, I would focus on these free programs intensely for a few weeks. I know it is hard, but as someone once said, fake it til you make it. Interviews used to terrify me. Then one day I realized how valuable a job interview is even if you do not get the job. It's good practice for future interviews.

[winterglen]

Thanks. The programs at the job offices is a good idea. I've asked my counselor about finding some in the area where I live.

[Gumption]

Try not to be too hard on yourself.

I am in the same boat.
I havent applied to a new job in 4 years... infact I havent worked for almost 4.5 years. Been a stay at home Mom. Had two children back to back.

You might not think you have skill but you do. THink of the work you have done... and apply yourself. No one is unemployable... its all about making a good impression. And you can do it.

I hope you find something that will make it easier on your stress level... and help you get that confidence back you need.

Lots of good karma your way.

[benson123]

Winterglen,
I’m sorry you are feeling like this. You will find another job. Job searching in not fun and it is hard work but I know it is possible. You sound very much like me: too hard on yourself and lacking confidence. I have intense job performance anxiety and always feel like I will fail. These are some of the issues I am trying to work through.
However, I have had lots of experience applying for jobs. Do you have a resume? I’m positive you have job skills employers are looking for. Make a list of things you have done at previous jobs like: customer service/relations, sales, records keeping, cash management etc. I don’t know what you did previously but those are some examples and then also think about skills that are transferable: communication, effective listening, making quality decisions, taking initiative, willingness to learn, etc. Again just some examples. I’m sure you will find you are not stupid or unreliable at all and have accomplished quite a bit. Also remember and this is something I have to tell myself because I have a lot of self doubt and blame everything on myself, you cannot make everyone happy. I hope some of these suggestions help.

[Malixer112]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

Even perfectionists struggle. Are you becoming unemployed against your desires, or just having a rough patch, at work?
Can you utilize resources,,at unemployment, for retraining?

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That sounds about accurate. I tend to be labeled as a perfectionist because of my grades, but I struggle to keep them (for example).