Is it wrong to feel content?

Years ago, I found that I wasn't going to be able to achieve my dreams and be married to this husband. So I gave up my dreams, because that was easier. I was depressed, eventually ended up at home, disabled, and got better meds, so I'm calm.

When I stopped seeing a therapist (I still see a pdoc), I eventually stopped having angst. My husband and I saw a marriage counselor long enough to learn how to resolve our differences.

I find being part of this community gives me a chance to help and be helped. It's a small contribution to the world, but it's enough, along with being kind in traffic and to sales people.

This is the first time in my life that I haven't been working on a self improvement project and I'm wondering if there's something wrong with me. Or is this how it's supposed to be when you get older?

I don't think there's anything "wrong" with you. Maybe you're just taking a break? I imagine you worked on self improvement projects in the past because you enjoyed or got something out of doing so. Just be content for a bit. If you get bored or have issues, sounds like you know where to look and how to start working to resolve them.

True contentment (not false) is my life goal. I think it's the right way to live, regardless of what you have or don't have etc. It comes by reframing your thoughts and perspectives, yes?

Maybe some of what you are experiencing is because of the meds. But until or unless you find yourself not caring about things you need to care about, enjoy!

Dr Clay's book talks about contentment: www.psychologicalselfhelp.org/Chapter12.pdf Good wishes!

Perna and Sky, thanks for taking me seriously. As always, I appreciate your wisdom. It soothes my soul to know you are out there.

Apparently life answers stupid questions. (I know it wasn't really stupid, but I like the way that sounds.) The point is, I might have been feeling guilty about being content. This morning I'm stressing about switching insurance companies. I don't feel guilty about that. It feels more familiar than the contentment did. Not better, just familiar.

I'm off to read what Dr. Clay says in his book.

(((hugs)))) Don't stress out..use that anxiety to push you to make that decision! No second guessing allowed

I was tempted to do my usual and run away from the problem, but I've been learning that facing them sooner rather than later eliminates a lot of stress.

So I phoned the insurance company and they couldn't have been nicer. I got it all worked out.

Thanks for the push!

Way to go!

I'm reporting back on my findings since starting this thread:

Almost immediately I was drawn into a family drama that shattered my contentment.

The outcome of trying to find stasis again is learning of a book about energy that promises to expand my resources.

My superstitious self says, in the future, don't let the universe know you're calm or it will bring that to an end. In the future, I will just enjoy it, not question it. However, if I hadn't, I wouldn't have grown, so...whatever! Heh.

Another idea is to make friends with the Universe like you would with yourself :-) That way you two can share the calm and know the Universe is not out to get you but can help in the opposite way. I was in a hail/rain storm coming home from T one summer's day and I couldn't see to drive and was extremely frightened so mentioned this to the Universe :-) and it let up some. Not bad if you're going to be superstitious or whatever, to believe it's on your side? We can think whatever we want, why not think good things?

I don't think it can be a constant, but like anything, a place to be and return to when at all possible. I have seen many a great person (Deepak Chopra, Dali Llama, Wayne Dyer) become unglued and angry in an outburst... and we all know their foundations.

"content" has been a goal of mine for a while. Had it. lost it, want it back

When I'm feeling content, I am able to live in the moment. Often, that also frees my mind to do self work more easily than during difficult times.

I don't think it has to be one or the other, I think content and self work can co-exist very beneficially.

I'm so glad you're feeling content. It's very peaceful!