[kaihigdontog]

i dont know what is going on whit me today i was down this morning then i walked out to get a smoke and came back almost happy. now i am on the down again. it has never been this bad befor i have cutt the last two days and i dont want to again. will i do relly bad but i dont wont th fill the same that comes with faller. i have hid all my tools but i still know were they are. i shud throw them away but i jest cant bring my selth to do it. what shuld i do?

[Abrums]

Originally Posted by kaihigdontog

i dont know what is going on whit me today i was down this morning then i walked out to get a smoke and came back almost happy. now i am on the down again. it has never been this bad befor i have cutt the last two days and i dont want to again. will i do relly bad but i dont wont th fill the same that comes with faller. i have hid all my tools but i still know were they are. i shud throw them away but i jest cant bring my selth to do it. what shuld i do?

kaihigdontog,

Was gona ask what your history was but I found the post where you talk about your dad and going into the army. First of all doesn't the army have free or next to free care for milatery personell? You should check into that. Go and see a therapist if you are not already.
For some reason I somewhat relate to this because I have suffered a loss and I hold a lot in without knowing how to release properly. It is hard to predict when I will feel down and it comes in waves at times. Just like when you suffer a loss, the pain comes in waves.
I'm sorry that there is not much I can say or do to help you but all you can do is hang in there. Try not to cut.

ABE