Reasons Not To

Thank you dayzee and thanks everyone else. *HUGS* to all of you. Thanks for sharing.
dayzee, I think you're probably right. I think a lot of people on here would agree with you. I wouldn't really know though, because I've never had medical treatment, mainly because I'm scared of people's reactions. So yeah, dayzee. You're right. And that's not a good thing...

But...to be totally honest, I don't really see a problem with SI for me at the moment. So I retract my reasons against it.

Reasons not to - interesting thread - happens to be my homework from my T this week also - so let's see --

The scars - I agree, that's a biggy

Shame - I would feel awful if my kids knew, I feel like others look down on us for it - why do something you are definitely NOT proud of - doesn't seem a healthy choice

Not a healthy way to cope - hope to be a therapist someday, wouldn't want to think that's how my T copes

Addiction - do I want to be addicted to anything? It's not any different from being addicted to alcohol, drugs, or overeating. An addiction is an addiction. Don't want to give my life over to that.

Abuse - As someone else pointed out, why continue? why take over where your abuser left off? If I give in to abusing myself, I'm suggesting that his view of my selfworth was right. I don't want to give him that.

Cycling - it was suggested that si fuels my depression which fuels my si - I need to break the cycle in order to feel better about myself and get out of this rut. I definitely want to stop feeling the way I do right now. I don't know how much longer I can last feeling this way. If stopping can change this feeling, then it would be worth it.

That's all I can think of right now. It has helped though. I guess I'll have to keep looking at this post and remembering what I'm working for. Thanks, Quay

Thank you too. Twas good posting.

I know this thread is old, but I've been gone a long time

I wrote these reasons not to si a long time ago, when I was trying to convince myself I wanted to quit.

I know that many of these reasons are hard to believe or internalize, but I hope this lists helps someone. Take it one day at a time...

It brings as many bad feelings as it chases away

You have hurt enough

Protecting the child inside you, who is already wounded

Self-injury makes relationships with others harder: it isolates you, may make you feel ashamed and/or feel the need to be secretive or push others away

You need to be able to experience your feelings in order to learn to cope effectively, and recover

Feeling worse about yourself after you're past the si incident

You do not need to have cuts or scars to prove it: your pain IS REAL

You do not deserve to be punished

You have a right to your feelings, and you have been denied that right for too long already

Avoiding si can help you learn to feel safe with yourself. You deserve to feel safe

You can rely on your higher power, whatever/whoever that may be to love and protect you. And you will feel that security and safety even more when you are not being self-destructive

Self-injury is a "quick-fix" that really doesn't fix the problem, only distracts from it temporarily

Real healing is possible for you, even though sometimes that is hard to believe

Why I never want to do it again - (maybe I won't)

1) Dignity - When I SI I attack my own dignity and make myself feel worse and less worthy (of love and attention, which everyone deserves)

2) Self-respect - Losing respect for myself and my inability to stop would destroy whatever shred of self-esteem I have left

3) Questionning - Hiding scars from people is hard (I use a manual wheelchair and I have to push up my sleeves to wheel places so they don't get dirty - This is how a few of my friends found out about my SIng)

4) Love - How can I say I love myself when I physically attack myself? I have problems with trying to love myself already, why do I want to make it harder for me?

So this is my small list of why I have to continue to fight to not return to self-injuring.

Hope it works.

I haven't SI d since Aug 8th 2004. I now have a couple of personal reasons not to SI that I wanted to share.

Reason #1: I have my family back. My wife could see that I was getting better and asked me to re-marry her. My four kids have been happier over the last five months than I have ever know them to be. Their mom and dad are together again.

Reason #2: I don't want to lose my family again. I understand that I might someday slip, but I no longer feel the emptiness that lead me to SI in the past.

Reason #3: I want to continue to be the father I've been since I've stopped acting out.

Reason #4: I don't hate myself anymore. If I don't SI I won't hate myself again.

Reason #5: I have enough scars. I don't need anymore.

Reason #6: I don't want to be sorry for cutting myself, driving me to cut again and again.

Reason #7: I'm happy.

Well......I NEVER discuss this at all. But I will add a reason to the list. The emotional reasons "NOT TO" get discussed a lot. The possible physical outcomes do not.

Infection.....Horrible Pain....Life Threatening.....Terrible Scars

I cut my inner elbow badly one evening. For the next few days, it got redder & redder. I started to run a fever and felt sick. I finally went to my doctor. I told him and others that I had done it accidentally. I ended up in the hopital for 10 days. Part of this in the ICU. The rest in isolation. I had gotten a staph/cellulitis infection. It got in my bloodstream. I became septic. My kidneys started to shut down. I had to go to surgery every other day for days to have more tissue cut away. They would leave the wound open with drains. Tons of IV antibiotics. Even a pain pump full of dilaudid did not give me full relief or let me sleep for more than a few minutes at a time. Misery. GUILT.........so much guilt.

I am being descriptive because this is the real story. It's scary & ugly. I had to endure a whole summer of physical therapy to get the function of my arm & hand back. I have a large chunk of the crook in my arm gone from the surgery to cut away the dead tissue. I will have this mutilated reminder to look at every day for the rest of my life.

Please think about this. I still want to SI lots of times. I have slipped a few even after almost dying. It's a powerful problem. I AM getting help and I AM getting better at knowing when I am at risk and what to do when that happens. Treat it seriously and work on it seriously.

tulips

1. I see how it hurts my husband as well as myself and i do not want to hurt either one of us anymore.
2.I am tired of the continuous circle of Self harming and hating myself for doing so i do it again.
3.I do not want any more scars
4.When i visit my baby sister i do not like the look she has on her face when she asks me, "sissy what happened" she is older now and she can see through the lies.

hugs and love to all of you!!!!

Why because it can cut veins which are made of a thick collegian coating and there is only so much collegian in your body and collegian also helps fight off fat and keep muscle.

I like this idea. I am glad you thought of it. Some of my reasons to list.

I don't want my daughter asking about boo boos on my body.

I want to become a therapist to help others who SI and I can't preach what I dont do myself.

I am a wonderful caring individual who deservers respect from others as well as myself. (Not sure I typed what I mean)

My husband loves me and he deserves to not have to constantly worry about me.

Have not SI in sooo long and want to keep up the work
I know if I SI just once it will bring back the old feelings and addictions and I will start up again.

For me why SI if I know it is only a temporary fix to my emotional problems and I will see the SI later and feel more bad feelings for doing it. I could do something fun like paint.

1. I dserve better than harming myself.

2.Not harming myself breaks the abuse cycle-my abuser hurt me back when I was little and had no choice, but now I can stop the abuse by no longer harming myself.

3.Self harm is the voice of my perpetrator saying I am no good. If I harm myself, then part of my is agreeing with my perpetrator.

4.If I don't harm myself, then I know the pain I feel isn't my fault.

5.If I harm myself, the pain from it will become confusd with the pain which my abuser caused me. I don't want to be confused about who caused my pain.

6.I don't want to have to blame myself for hurting myself. Blame belongs to my abuser, not me.

Now if only I could practice what I preach.......

Very hard to socialise (can't go swimming, can't go gym etc)

I have to say, this is a really amazing thread. I'm going to write some of these reasons down in a notebook to carry around
What stops me is knowing my best friend will be able to tell what I've done. He's the only person in the world who knows about my SI and he's done his best to love and help me. I know how much my SI hurts him and I can't bear to disappoint him after all he's done for me. Knowing that he cares and that he believes in me keeps me holding on.

Y'all have shared so many good reasons not to hurt yourselves.

Here are my reasons:
- I have God siblings and younger children who look up to me
- If I am swimming in my own misery, I cannot even dream of helping others
- I deserve better (stop putting yourself in other's shoes, put others in your shoes - would your friends deserve it if they were in your situation?)
- My body is a temple and every day it is living on is borrowed time... there are people who do not have arms or hands or people who live with chronic pain who would give anything to be a healthy 21 year old with strong arms and a healthy body.
- My mother is dying of cancer. I want her to die happy. I want her to know she raised a child who - in the end- was able to conquer and make her proud... a child who was able to grow into a responsible, whole, happy adult.
- I don't do hurt myself in the hopes that tomorrow will be better... I like waking up fresh and new, not with a literal and painful reminder of yesterday's griefs.
- I don't do it because I love my fiance more than I am angry with myself.
- I don't do it because I want to work on making my mind healthier without my body to distract me...
- I want my mind to be healthy for my future children
- I don't do it... because deep down, I really do love myself =]
- I don't do it because I want to add more positive things to this world.
- I don't do it... because I want y'all to know that recovery can be achieved... I don't do it.... for you

~BxD

- Good luck to those on the road to recovery, and be safe for those who are not quite ready yet -

There are always reasons not to do something. The reasons are different for eveybody. But sometimes they are the same. Now everybody has posted a lot great reasons we why should not SI so far. I think another great reason is if you have somebody that looks up to you even if that is just one person. THEY MATTER. And sometimes when they see us do this to ourselves it makes them as if they do not matter. Even if we know that is not true. We just have to remember that they are watchingand what we do matters. We all wish we had never started down this violent and vicious path of self-injury, so let's not influence another life or soul to do the same. However you look at it.

The main reason why I try my hardest not to cut ,

is simply because I don't want to upset my friends .

They mean so much to me ,

and seeing them get hurt because of my actions ,

is enough to make me want to die .

No other reason seems good enough .

I don't care enough about myself to care what people would think of the scars and I don't worry about the infections or anything else .

I just don't want to see those I hold close being hurt .

" Well thanks yourself, so you you. =) Could understand a maximum omen so, unless authorized not my best = English coins "

Few reasons not do it.
1 It is really not worth to hurt yourself. Yes it take away the emotional pain but the physical pain be there.
2. One may end in a psychward
3. A parent will treat you rude

The main reason and I like what my boss told me He was in a class and a teacher said"I want to see you next week not read about you"

my reasions to try not to hert my selth.
1. if anyone ever found out they would freek
2. it might land me in a mental ward
3. it is hard to do any thang one you are wereing long pants and long slive shirts in the summer
4. my selth ham feeds on it's selth. i get down i cutt i hill beather for a littel wile then i get lower so i cutt again... it is a bad cilcye.
5. if i do selth harm i have to clean up the blood.

Thanks to all of you. Today I really needed to read all of these just to get through the day. I just wanted you all to know that I really appreaciate this thread. I think it's very important to have something like this. That way, when someone is having a day where SI seems like their only way of getting through it, they can come here and see all the reasons why it's not. Thank you!