[Zenobia]

My anger has gotten too big. It is flowing into all areas of my life. I need to get control over it. I wanted to kill my customers today. I wanted to throttle a J-hole that was trying to pick me up while I was on lunch break. Was so close to screaming at him to F off. Ended up going to the parking garage across the street and running the steps. It is seven stories and I did them twice. The first time I hit the basement I screamed obsinities at the top of my lungs and kick the cement wall a few times. A wee bit out of control. When I got back to work I did better. Emy sent me down to Guinevere's were there was a huge british food order for me to get lost in. It helped. After work I went into the bar and downed a screw driver. Another J-hole tried to pick up on me there and I just blew him off. I was in the bar maybe a minute and a half before leaving. Now I have a pretty good buzz on. I think I can make it through the nighttime stories. Then I have some reports to prepare and run off for my books so I will be able to lose myself in them.

I see my son's teacher on thursday morning and I managed to get an appointment to see my therapist immediately afterwards. I think I will be ok.
Carrie

PS I know I should be flattered by the men who tried to pick me up but I am just to pissed off at the world right now. I feel sorry for them. What is wrong with them that they would be attracted to a woman who is so freaking crazy? I mean I don't get picked up on nearly as much when I am in a normal mood. What is up with that?

<font color=green>Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.--Emily Dickenson

[somebodyelse]

Carrie, I hope that things are going better today.

(Those men probably sense a vulnerability in you when you're down and are trying to take advantage of it. Or maybe there's some truth to the old line "You're beautiful when you're angry".).

[Rapunzel]

Carrie,

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I hate being angry. Hope you're feeling better.

Maybe some men think crazy ladies would be fun? Or easy to take advantage of?

-Wendy

<font color=green>"Someone may have stolen your dream when it was young and fresh and you were innocent. Anger is natural. Grief is appropriate. Healing is mandatory. Restoration is possible." -Jane Rubietta</font color=green>

[Zenobia]

I am feeling better today. I still find it rather disturbing how some men pick up on instablity so easily. It is creepy. Thanks both of you for your thoughts.
Carrie

<font color=green>Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.--Emily Dickenson