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#1
Nov 04, 2011, 07:29 PM
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It's been over a week since I've cut. People are happy for me and say good job. I know better. I know it will come back. The question is when. I'm not happy. I know it's a pause. That may be negative but I've gone a week before and crawled back to SI. I'm not going to fool myself and believe that this time will be different. I don't see a future without SI.I used to, but not anymore. It's going to haunt me forever. I hate that.
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#2
Nov 04, 2011, 07:52 PM
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haunt all of us, could be. Us hating the addiction of si, Very True. There has to be a way to not be addicted to the si.
Good luck in finding out how. It can be done, others before us have done it, which means we can do it too! |
 ginger1776
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#3
Nov 04, 2011, 08:39 PM
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Hey Ginger..
I know people that have been SI free for years...I know it can be beat. But like other addictions, we will just have to be a little more aware and watch out for some triggers and be more in tune and stay a little more mentally fit to make sure it doesn't recur. Yeah, I'm really proud of you for being free for a week..but like you...not setting up a parade route yet..lol. Just keep taking it slow and easy and steady...balanced. The urges are still going to come so be prepared and don't be surprised by them and you'll start getting that real time under your belt. You're doing great and sound like you know the ropes. Hope is still always your best weapon. Hugs, Wysteria Blue 
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 Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your heart. Who looks outside, Dreams... Who looks inside, Awakens... - Carl Jung |
| ginger1776
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#4
Nov 04, 2011, 08:46 PM
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First off, I'd like to congratulate you on your 1 week without SI, awesome job!
I can relate to your feeling that SI will creep up on you once again. Whenever I worry, it just makes me feel worse and I can't appreciate that, on this day, I am not cutting! So what helps me is to focus on today and today only, because I cannot control the past, nor can I predict what will happen tomorrow. I am almost 6 months SI-free and living in the moment helps tremendously because I don't hold extremely high expectations of myself. I hope that living in the moment can be helpful for you too! Also, everyone slips and falls...but what matters is that we get up, dust ourselves off and try again. I have slipped many times trying to stop cutting, and it can be EXTREMELY difficult to get up (I'm sure you know what I mean!), but getting up is the most important part towards recovery. Sending you hugs and positive vibes
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| ginger1776, puzzclar, Wysteria
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#5
Nov 05, 2011, 03:02 PM
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Working on why you SI in therapy is the way to recover from it. How has your work on it in therapy been going?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
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