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  #1  
Old May 16, 2012, 03:01 PM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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Location: Kent, UK
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I feel I'm there again. Depressed and pointless. Want to take some of my legtover tabs. Or just a few more than my prescription... Ahhhhh... Maybe it's attention - I'm just feel empty... Taken a few - but it's safe. I'll be ok. Going to sleep
Hugs from:
agma, Mike_J

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  #2  
Old May 16, 2012, 03:17 PM
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Trippin2.0 Trippin2.0 is offline
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Please stay safe jacky, I hardly sleep, so call, text or email if you want to talk. Many hugs coming your way
  #3  
Old May 16, 2012, 03:26 PM
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Mike_J Mike_J is offline
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Ditto Trippin2.0, please stay safe.
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“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. ... We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi

Last edited by Mike_J; May 16, 2012 at 03:27 PM. Reason: added hug
  #4  
Old May 16, 2012, 11:45 PM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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I'm awake now. Not feeling too well, but ok
Hugs from:
Idiot17, Mike_J
  #5  
Old May 28, 2012, 05:35 AM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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I while back I took 40mg Clonazepam out of the blue. At the moment I'm loving Klonopin. It's not a lot. I only have 0.5mg tabs. And my doc says I can have 3 per day. But they make me float. When I have my wine with them, I feel better. I don't remember much - I was @ home with my bf tho, but I like not having any thoughts at all. Like an empty brain
  #6  
Old May 29, 2012, 02:09 AM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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Sannah - you there?
  #7  
Old May 29, 2012, 02:10 AM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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Sorry - didn't mean clonazepam - would have prob been in a coma. Meant citalopram
  #8  
Old May 29, 2012, 11:53 PM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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There's no-one here
  #9  
Old May 30, 2012, 03:28 AM
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splitz splitz is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2009
Posts: 314
I'm here!
I know you don't know me but I will prob be around for the next hour if you want to talk.
I'm glad that you woke up today and hope those groggy feelings wear off soon. I understand wanting that floaty no feeling thing, I think I'd stay there all the time if I could but it's just not possible (or practical).
Did your bf notice what you had done?
Why do you think you are feeling like this now? Do you have a T you can talk to and be honest with?
Please try and stay safe.
Splitz.
  #10  
Old May 30, 2012, 03:55 AM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2010
Location: Kent, UK
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My bf has finally noticed that something isn't right, but I'm remaining in denial. At least he has noticed I've been depressed. Feel like I want to drift off into that world again.
Last night I purposly took a Klonopin before my evening drink, which I ensured was a bottle of wine.
I know this is my form of self-injury. Because I have no self-worth at the moment.
I haven't had a T for about a year.

I'm Bipolar and this is a really bad depressive phase
  #11  
Old May 30, 2012, 04:04 AM
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splitz splitz is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2009
Posts: 314
Sorry you are still feeling so bad. Why do you think that you have no self worth at the moment?
I'm glad your bf has noticed that something is wrong, is he helpful?
Are you on any meds / antidepressants at the moment? Are you able to go and talk to your Dr and ask for help? Maybe it's time to see a T again if you think that would be helpful?
Like you my horse (and dog) are my main forms of therapy although I do see a human too!
Is there anything that you can think of that I, You or anyone else can do to help?
Splitz.
  #12  
Old May 31, 2012, 03:31 PM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2010
Location: Kent, UK
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A bottle of wine, 4 Klonopin and possibly more to follow. I cant stop til I can't feel
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"I'd rather attempt to do something great and fail than to attempt to do nothing and succeed. Robert H. Schuller"

Current dx: Bipolar Disorder Unspecified

Current Meds: Epitec (Lamotrigine) 300mg, Solian 50mg, Seroquel 25mg PRN, Metformin 500mg, Klonopin prn
  #13  
Old May 31, 2012, 03:50 PM
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Miss Laura Miss Laura is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,275
Suga,

Call someone please!! You really need to talk to someone
  #14  
Old Jun 04, 2012, 02:43 AM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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I was ok. I bit groggy the next morning.
I know I need to stop it
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