[wishIwouldchange]

Hard day, hard week, seems like hard life. Try to take moments of joy, but life is so challenging. I would never give up on life, but would really like my sh to cope. I have now made it more than 7 months, but each day of this month seems to be a real challenge. I want to just be positive, be joyful, be grateful, but then I have a cruddy day and it all goes out the window.

With sh and gambling, I don't know how to get a good group of supportive people in my life. My job makes that nearly impossible. My therapist says I need more support people in my life. It isn't like I can just go grab a person, say be my friend, and by the way I struggle with sh and gambling and need a support in my life.

I am clinching my teeth, but want to give up the 7 months, but then I don't know if I really want to do that. The one friend I do have says that is so two years ago, and I won't enjoy it like I have in the past. She says it will hurt next time or if I do it again.

Life is just..... ugh....

[Sam2]

Originally Posted by wishIwouldchange

Hard day, hard week, seems like hard life. Try to take moments of joy, but life is so challenging. I would never give up on life, but would really like my sh to cope. I have now made it more than 7 months, but each day of this month seems to be a real challenge. I want to just be positive, be joyful, be grateful, but then I have a cruddy day and it all goes out the window.

With sh and gambling, I don't know how to get a good group of supportive people in my life. My job makes that nearly impossible. My therapist says I need more support people in my life. It isn't like I can just go grab a person, say be my friend, and by the way I struggle with sh and gambling and need a support in my life.

I am clinching my teeth, but want to give up the 7 months, but then I don't know if I really want to do that. The one friend I do have says that is so two years ago, and I won't enjoy it like I have in the past. She says it will hurt next time or if I do it again.

Life is just..... ugh....

You are right, you can't just magically find someone to give you support. However, online support can be helpful, and I'm glad you have found this forum.
Both self harm and gambling are addictive behaviors, which I'm sure you have figured out for yourself already.

Having a self inflicted injury hurt more would be the least of my concerns. Escalation of the behavior from mild or moderate to severe can easily occur. One slip up and you bleed to death or permanetly maim yourself. Both of your addictions are difficult to overcome on your own, so i'm very glad you have a therapist. Now you have us as well.

My main concern is that over time, it will take deeper and deeper cuts to give even temporary relief. If you haven't done it for a long time, do everything in your power not to start again. Once you do, like any addiction, the tendency is to fall back into the pattern of frequent self harm.

Life is hard and challenging. More so for some than others. Why some of us struggle so hard while other seem to get through life with only minor problems is a question no one can really answer. All we can do is try our best to continue fighting to overcome our pain. Know that you are not alone here. No one here will judge you, and we all know what it is like first hand. Sometimes just venting can keep you from exploding into a self harming episode.

Sam2

[ickydog2006]

Have you looked up any support groups in your area? I've used AA in the past when no other groups are in my area.

[nicoleb2]

Support is hard to come buy. Maybe you coulf look into a group for people who felf hard, or who are addicted to gambling.. or just a general mental health group therapy

[wishIwouldchange]

well, I am hanging in there. Trying things such as support groups, therapy, and hobbies. Thanks for sharing. It helps to know there are people out there that understand what I am going through.

[beadlady29]

beads just recently sh after not doing so far a long tiem......now it is all we think about......doing it again we mean....................we r gritting our teeth and staying online or working on beadwork to try and distract ourself from these thoughts...we start therapy with a new T nest thursday .finally after two and a half very long months with no T.........sure hope it works out...........it has to before we go friggin nuts!!!!!!
anyways just wanted too let u know ujr definitely not alone and hope u can resist the temptations gooder n we did.
sending peacefull thunkeds ur way,
all of us beadies

[wishIwouldchange]

Thanks for sharing beads. I am back in my right mind and doing better today. I hope to make it through the next few months and end up with a year free from sh. I am very hopeful that I will make it through the times of struggling, and being able to post and hear others stories and read others encouragement really makes a difference. It all really helps!

Thank you all!

[wishIwouldchange]

Originally Posted by beadlady29

beads just recently sh after not doing so far a long tiem......now it is all we think about......doing it again we mean....................we r gritting our teeth and staying online or working on beadwork to try and distract ourself from these thoughts...we start therapy with a new T nest thursday .finally after two and a half very long months with no T.........sure hope it works out...........it has to before we go friggin nuts!!!!!!
anyways just wanted too let u know ujr definitely not alone and hope u can resist the temptations gooder n we did.
sending peacefull thunkeds ur way,
all of us beadies

I am sorry that you are struggling too. I hope you can celebrate the time that you did make it, and take one step at a time, one moment at a time.