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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2013
Location: United States
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#21
I use to bash my head on the basement walls or ceramic sinks at work or the granite counter(the granite hurt and caused the most damage).
I did not need much as this was painful and did the job quicker than burning or cutting. It calmed me down fast because well when you bang your brain you get a little lethargic. I have not had to do that in over a year but the urge comes on bad when overwhelmed with frustrating emotions or self hatred comes on. __________________ When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors. |
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notz, stahrgeyzer
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#22
I used to hit and bang my head hard as an escape for my anxiety issues and stressful school work 5 years back.
Now the urge is back again. I wanted to full on crash my head into the wall but couldn't have the guts to do it and that makes me feel worse. I still end up doing it but there is not enough impact to make my head feel very painful or to induce some sort of concussion/memory loss. |
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notz
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Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: CA
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#23
I don't hit my head, but I punch my own arms or hit my arm against a hard edge like a counter or wall corner.
It's something I do much more impulsively in the moment if I'm frustrated or upset with myself, unlike cutting which requires at least some planning, being at home, and cleanup. That makes it a lot harder to quit. |
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notz, stahrgeyzer
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Member Since May 2018
Location: Concord, NH
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#24
When I get really angry, I punch myself in the head hard. Sometimes only once out of frustration, but I mostly hit multiple times until I'm almost knocked out. I see black spots and feel foggy for awhile. I think that I do it because I want to stop what I'm feeling emotionally. I also feel like if I knock myself out, I can't hurt the person I love anymore. Hope this helps, even though it sucks, it's kind of nice to know that I'm not the only one who does this.
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Feathers143, notz, stahrgeyzer
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Location: Wisconsin
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#25
I do it because I hate myself. Pure, undistilled loathing. I just lost my gf. She just...didn't want me anymore. And of course, I blame myself because everyone leaves in the end. And this time, I was the cause of it for some unknown reasons. So this lead me to not only raging out and hitting myself, but doing so at 80 mph an hour down the interstate. My hands shake as I type that. I realize how dangerous that was, and in the very center of that rage, I didn't care. Make me lose my gf, mofo? That was the one thought I had. I really feel a rather strange urge to seperate myself from this other half of me and use pronouns other than "myself," that's how badly I loathe myself.
Feels even stranger to find some others who also feel that this is a form of self-harm. |
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Feathers143, notz, stahrgeyzer
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#26
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I can strongly relate to this. When I get super upset and frustrated, I begin uncontrollably punching my thighs. Sometimes I use objects to hit myself with. I figure it's better than hurting someone else, which I have rarely ever had the urge to do anyway. I haven't cut myself in over 6 years, so that is not a habit I want to get back into; even though I have had the strong urge today to do it. Somehow, my mind justifies "punching", as if it's somehow different than cutting. Even though it's basically the same, in essence. They are both "self-harm", just manifest in a different way. You're not alone in this. |
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Legendary
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: USA
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#27
Starting in my 40’s after years of frustration in a bad marriage, specifically intimacy issues, I smacked myself in the head with my brush. I had never even thought of doing that before in all my life. Never even heard of anyone doing it. No one gave me the idea. I continued doing this kind of SH for a few years. It was automatic and uncontrolled during extreme frustration. The blinding pain, hot, surging through me felt exquisitely good for a moment. I had hoped the SH would scare my husband into giving me what I wanted, but it didn’t. I stopped the SH.
I went to therapists. I have learned the moment they hear anything regarding SH, they say “Borderline”. __________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
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Member Since Apr 2019
Location: Uk
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#28
Just did a search on Google for banging my own head. Did this a couple of nights ago for the first time in years and still incredibly sore. What a lot of people are saying on this thread really resonated with what I'm going through from punching thighs, pinching and banging my head. I scream at the tip of my lungs when doing a lot of motorway driving too which helps me.
At present I am undergoing a serious amount of stress along with young kids and not the easiest of husbands who can be very critical when he's stressed. It all stems from childhood of having a disconnected mother who has never accepted the role she played in causing her children's mental health problems and a father that was frankly awful at me throughout my childhood (which to his credit has admitted that he was horrible back then and regrets it). I had counselling at 14 for 3 years to which I was diagnosed with depression. I have been on antidepressants through difficult phases of my life (have only come off medication which been on for the last 3 years, 3 months ago). I don't regret it and trying to cope through SH again as feel antidepressants alter my personality and perceptions of stuff around me making me more inclined to accept rather than challenge people or situations. I've not been diagnosed with much else as very distrusting of health providers and the labels they put on people (i have a very good friend whose been labelled as such and feel that has made her feel worse which I think it would make me feel worse). Don't feel it's fair when they put the word disorder in these labels as it's out of a person's control having a bad childhood that doesn't enable the right development steps. I feel society is quite apathetic when it comes to such things, rather medicate than treat. I have drawn these conclusions from school who let me down, even ostracized due to my race and neighbours that heard abuse taking place and would ostracize (primarily due to race). |
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Super Moderator
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#29
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This may be of interest. Alternatives to Self-Harm with Dialectical Behavior Therapy | Dialectical Behavior Therapy Understood __________________ Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
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Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2012
Location: Scotland
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#30
what can you do in the moment instead of hurting yourself soothe yourself try hugging a teddie or pillow try writing down your feelings what can you do to deescalate your anger ?
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Underground
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#31
One of my littles self harms by punching herself or banging her head. We always know when she has been out because when we come back the body is sore and covered in bruises.
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SlumberKitty
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Magnate
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#32
I score very high in borderline personality disorder and hit myself in my head and sometimes stomach too often but I'm trying my best to stop it. One time after hitting my head I had problems using my right fingers for a few days.
This is a form of self hate, right? For me it just feels so good. During those moments I just want to squeeze the life out of this body. |
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SlumberKitty
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Legendary
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#33
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Legendary
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#34
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Legendary
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#35
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Legendary
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#36
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Legendary
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#37
I did it for a short while in my life, when my frustration and anger, and confusion about whether it is my mental health or bad relationships was at it’s peak. I decided it is bad relationships I suffer, and I am pretty ok. I stopped doing anything to hurt myself now. It’s been six months. During that time, I was diagnosed borderline traits, probably because of that SH. It was only a short-lived means of coping after extreme stress and exasperation! I never did it before (35 years old) and I don’t do it anymore in my early 50’s.
__________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
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Legendary
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#38
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Legendary
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#39
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#40
Are there any coping skills for head banger?
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