[Daeva]

Anyone else? I don't know why I do this when I am feeling happy and good but I do. I don't think I'm capable of dealing with any emotions anymore.

[smmath]

I do self harm when I feel good. I feel like when I am doing good I have more physical strength to do it. Maybe feeling good is odd to you, and you don't know how to handle it, so you SI to feel more comfortable

[Frankbtl]

Hi, maybe feeling good feels a little "wrong"/"out of place" to you or something's saying in you that you don't deserve to be happy, or it won't last anyway so you'll "step in there", maybe emotions are becoming overwhelming??
I'm NOT saying you need to feel like this at all but could those be possibilities?
Then again SI can sometimes be real addicting anyway, and an addiction is an addiction...........so........do you think?
Hang in there!!
Alison

[grey_aj]

I do this sometimes too, it's like everything is perfectly fine and I don't feel like harming myself but I do anyways.

- AJ

[Daeva]

Yes I feel like I don't know how to handle good or bad or any emotions and for me cutting makes me feel numb, so that could be it, it's just frustrating that i can't have any emotions that don't make me si

[reesecups]

SI is also an addiction. I would correlate it, IMO, to an alcoholic. They drink for all kinds of reasons...happy, sad, etc.

[Daeva]

Never thought of comparing it to alcohol thanks Reese's!

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by Daeva

Anyone else? I don't know why I do this when I am feeling happy and good but I do. I don't think I'm capable of dealing with any emotions anymore.

I have a guess on this. I only ever self injured to punish myself or to relieve anxiety or anger. Since self injury releases endorphins in your brain when you're feeling bad, then it makes people feel relief in ways, but if you're already happy, maybe you are doing it to stay out of the sorrow..to keep yourself stable, because since sibcalms people, and affects your mood, maybe you're relying on it to stabilize all your moods that you aren't sure how to deal with.
Maybe if you allowed yourself to be happy and say to yourself that you're going to go for a walk or clean instead then it will keep your mood stable as well probably and give you something productive to do.

feeling bad, anxious, guilt. seeing old marks fade. Lack of focus or ability to concentrate.

ANY of these can set me off.

yes me.

i think the reason being, that i've been doing it for so long that it just comes natural regardless of how i'm feeling

[willowbrook]

Originally Posted by smmath

Maybe feeling good is odd to you, and you don't know how to handle it, so you SI to feel more comfortable

I can definitely see this as a possibility. I've also self harmed when I've been feeling good - it's like "Okay I'm calm, I'm happy, I feel relaxed, there's absolutely nothing bothering me today at all - quick better cut". It is almost like I'm just not used to feeling normal so it freaks me out and makes me think something's wrong.

Normal = Not a typical feeling = I actually feel abnormal in feeling normal = must cut to feel truly normal.

It's very confusing, I agree. At least when I'm cutting for a specific emotion I can do more to stop myself by dealing with that emotion.

[neverforget]

I self harm when I feel the need to, and I feel the need to in different states, happy, sad, angry. I don't think you are alone in that at all.