the urge

the urge to cut right now is great!
had an alright day and it was proactive to say the least but nowthat its close to bedtime and everyone's relaxing and im.........well im wanting , needing to cut bad. i just took a nice hot bath and now im hoping writing to you guys on here will distract me for wanting to cut so bad.

I've not done anything since finding PC, so hope it works for you too. My favourite distraction used to be trying to draw a picture using both my right hand and left hand at the same time. I'd start with a simple outline and draw both sides simultaneously, I'm right handed so I'd have to slow my right hand down and concentrating on that stopped my left hand wobbling. It was just about the most frustrating and pointless thing I've ever done, but that was kind of the point. Do you have any distractions?

i clean and organize things but its to late i si already on my arm

What do you think made you do it?

For me it's not much different than the reason you'd want to hurt anyone--to punish them. Vengeance. Just like lightning is a burst of energy balancing out the negative and positive charges. When I hurt myself, I feel I deserve it. It helps to think of me doing it to someone else: would that teach them? Help them? Motivate or encourage them? If no, then why should it make me feel better? Don't know if I'm making sense.

My distractions are doing something to benefit another person, and exercise/tasks.

wanting to be in the wedding like i was planing on but since having to cancel ive been a wreck but trying to keep busy but at night is the worst with the hate i feel and disappointment i have for myself starts to come into play. even with this meds im taking that should make me want to sleep i get wired when im wanting to self injure

I relapsed tonight...After 3 years of progress, I did it to both my arms and now I feel worse than ever

Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

Me and you both. Are you OK?

~warm hug from me to you~

I'm better now that my ativan kicked in a few hours ago. But extremely disappointed right now. I called my T because she always tries to squeeze me in for emergencies but she wasn't at the office yet

Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

Yeah my T's never available when I need her so I know what u mean there

~warm hug from me to you~

My T wasn't available and told me to go to the ER I'm not really wanting to do that

Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

oh like right now go to the ER?

Yes, I've been sitting in the er for a couple hours now while they do paperwork and get a room ready. Le sigh

Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk

ohh huh i hope things go good for you and there nice and take real good care of you there

i really want to cut and cut deep something that will get me relief and so tired and done with this mind of sadness