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#1
Dec 10, 2006, 11:32 PM
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I wrote this tonight. I think it describes pretty accurately where I am right now and how I'm doing.... Honestly things are really hard..but down deep in the pit of who I am... I'm holding on to a morsel of hope that just maybe... I can beat this.
Untitled Every day I face you in the mirror your cold stare sees deep into my heart it's as if you know I'm fragile and you deceive me. You whisper gently in my ear that you're here to help with you, I can survive. I try to rebel and push you away but instead you swim deeper into my abyss I cry tears of crimson -and they stain my pale skin. I know that you brought those tears when all I would ask is for the walls to be broken and the cleansing water to fall freely and clearly... washing away the pain of the past But again, lies they tell me that I'll never find my freedom. That without you, I'm crumble and if questioning eyes saw what I've tried so desperately to hide I would be shunned destined to be more alone and feel more alone than I already do. From within this deep, strong wall holding behind it the pain of my past I can feel something stir a calm, soothing wind A Still Small Voice urging me on ..fight. ..don't give up. ... you can win. and for a moment those words become my crutch my strength. Dare I believe that something stronger than I really live inside this iron tomb? He speaks again.. ..fight ...don't give up ....you can win. How can I ignore something as bold as this? It can't be anything I have created or posess for my flesh is weak and broken this Voice...it's strong and Mighty. I chose to fight. I can't give in because behind that deep, strong wall an army is forming.. with a Great Commander His forces are preparing for a battle greater than I've ever known. I'm unsure if I'll survive it but I have to try because in that army and with my Great Commander I've found a morsel of hope. It's Hope that I must hold on to for my very life depends on it.. It depends on Him.... and He's worth one last battle He's worth risking it all for hope in a stronger me found only in my weakness because with Him I am told ..I am more than a conquorer.
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“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” Elizabeth Kubler- Ross |
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#2
Dec 11, 2006, 04:02 AM
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You have no idea how much I needed that right now. Thank you
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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. |
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#3
Dec 11, 2006, 02:32 PM
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Hello I hope the best for you in your recovery. I admire your courage in wanting to help yourself to recover. Take care Sincerely Soidhonia
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The Caged Bird Sings with a Fearful Trill of Things Unknown and Longed for Still and his Tune is Heard on the Distant Hill for the Caged Bird Sings of Freedom |
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