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#1
Mar 21, 2014, 02:37 PM
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I'm not sure if I am going to explain this well, but here goes..
Yesterday my T and I started to explore my SI and Sui thoughts. I discovered that when it is SI, it is me telling myself that is what I am going to do, so " I am going to do x,y,z"...but when it is the sui thoughts, it is like someone else telling me "Go on, you can do it.." Maybe it is not significant, but I am just a little confused right now and wondered if anyone else can relate to this?
__________________
Soup |
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#2
Mar 21, 2014, 03:22 PM
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Yup..... I think we all "know better". But in the end, self harm feeds some form of control or coping or release that we do not get normally. So we give in.
Does that make sense? |
 SoupDragon
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#3
Mar 21, 2014, 04:21 PM
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Regarding SI, I think my mind tells me to stop the mental pain, SI is my ony way to bring me back to reality. I think it's feeling that fuels my suicide thoughts, because when I came close, I had to admit I didn't really want die, I just wanted the pain gone.
__________________
Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha  |
| SoupDragon
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#4
Mar 21, 2014, 06:59 PM
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Si I plan. Sui thoughts seems to plan its self and then imform me of the when and how.
__________________
Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
| tealBumblebee
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#5
Mar 22, 2014, 07:31 PM
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Quote:
__________________
A majorly depressed, anxious and dependent, schizotypal hypomanic beautiful mess ...[just a rebel to the world with no place to go...  ]
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| SoupDragon
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#6
Mar 25, 2014, 10:20 PM
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i think both are my heads idea. i dont feel in control of the thoughts.
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| SoupDragon
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#7
Mar 26, 2014, 12:30 AM
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I feel like for me SI is something I want to do but when having suicidal thoughts I am just feeling hopeless and I disconnect from myself sort of so much that it feels as if someone else is trying to make me do it.
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#8
Mar 27, 2014, 04:37 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Soup |
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#9
Mar 28, 2014, 12:18 AM
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Quote:
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| SoupDragon
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#10
Mar 28, 2014, 01:20 PM
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I never thought of it like that but I completely agree, actually. Sui just appears but si is actually thought out.
__________________
I hope you have a really great day. 
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| SoupDragon
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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