[Nicoleresati]

I start crying randomly and hit something and then stop and I'm blank. I was choking myself and I choked myself harder and stopped. I got up I was fine and then I started crying again and stopped. I started choking myself and then panicking because I couldnt get a good enough grip or do it hard enough. Then i got up and I banged my head into the door over and over again. I sat back down I was fine I started laughing about the whole thing, and then I'm mad again I hit myself in the face and then I get mad that I was hitting myself and slapped myself. Now I'm just laughing. What is this? I know this isn't what this whole site is about, but I don't understand. I'm happy, them I'm sad and I'm angry, and then I'm laughing now and it is a cycle that's repeating. This has been going on for an hour now, it happens often. Not for this long I don't think When this happens I have trouble deciphering reality from not, or at least during this one. I thought I was dreaming again..like in a fog. Now I'm completely fine, again.Thanks.

[kaliope]

i have several red flags go up when i read this, but we arent allowed to diagnose here. Questioning your reality is a sign that this goes beyond self-harm. If this is not something you have addressed with a therapist, i highly recommend that you do get yourself in with a professional to be evaluated.

take care of yourself and if this continues to happen, do something to where you are not alone. reach out for some help. take care

[Nicoleresati]

I actually had a panic attack a few weeks ago and had the reality thing happen then. I have since brought it up with her, but I have a note I was sort of journaling and started arguing with myself on paper. I'm going to see her within the hour and brought it so she could see, or make more sense of what I have told her before. Thank you for you time!

[Fizzyo]

Kaliope is talking sense, please take care of yourself, as s/he suggests. You're worth it, truly worth it.