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#1
May 30, 2007, 10:04 PM
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as i sit here, with crimson tears surrounding me, i wonder when will it get better? i wonder, how many more times can i do this before it ends? The crimson tears give comfort, an inner peace, that i thought i had earlier this evening, but no, that was false security, waiting for me to be alone to strike, when i am weakest. Sitting here waiting for tomo, waiting for the meetings to start, for the counselling to start. i have to talk, tell them about the abuse, tell them, what i havent told anyone, about when i was raped at uni. i have to tell them, and not kill myself in the process. why cant the boxes close, why dont the crimson tears help? its the same old me, same old pathetic me, too weak to fight, i should fight but no, i cant, too weak, pathetic, what a waste of space i am. i am sorry for taking up your time
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#2
May 30, 2007, 10:28 PM
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(((((((((((((((((((((madmusician))))))))))))))))))))))))) I am sorry for all the pain you are feeling. Please try and be kind to yourself. You deserve it. Take care.
BB
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#3
May 30, 2007, 11:00 PM
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((((((((((((((( madmusician ))))))))))))))))
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#4
Jun 01, 2007, 04:37 PM
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Just wanted to let you know that I read your post and that I care...How did the counseling go?
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Direction  Ripple Effect - Small things can make a difference |
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#5
Jun 01, 2007, 07:24 PM
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Dear MM
You need Emergency Assistance, if you have you Therapist # call now, call someone close to you who will listen to take you to a hospital they can help you madmusician.You don't have to be alone during this time. You need to Act. People care about you. You are important & a precious human being especially to all of us at PC. |
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#6
Jun 01, 2007, 09:53 PM
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(((((((((((((((((madmusican)))))))))))
I'm sorry for all the pain that you are going through right now ... and I wish there were someway that we could all come together and make you feel beter on here. But just know that we care ... and that everything will be okay. You're not wasting anybody's time .. keep writing, and try and be good to yourself. Hang in there, Jacq 
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The unexamined life is not worth living. -Socrates |
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#7
Jun 02, 2007, 12:11 PM
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thanks for your replies guys. I survived that night, only just. Called my emergency team who told me to distract!!!!!!! Like I hadnt been tryin that already! The counselling session was ok, i think I will get on with my counsellor, she was very honest and open with me, so I think it'll be ok.
I am feeling really nervous today, have to return to work on Monday, having been off for 5 weeks. I know that cutting is not the way to get through it but it is the only way i know how  Have bought myself arm warmers to cover up my arms when I go back to work, but I know the kids will ask...trouble with being a teacher I spose!
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#8
Jun 02, 2007, 01:12 PM
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(((MADMUSICIAN))).
I am sorry that you are struggling at this time. I am glad that you were ablwe to see your team. If you need them this weekend plase call them to help you. Take care (((MADMUSICIAN))). Soidhonia
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The Caged Bird Sings with a Fearful Trill of Things Unknown and Longed for Still and his Tune is Heard on the Distant Hill for the Caged Bird Sings of Freedom |
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#9
Jun 02, 2007, 05:53 PM
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((((((((((((((((( madmusician ))))))))))))))))))
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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