My self harm journey

willowtigger · Oct 22, 2022 at 03:31 PM

we all love a Kit

SlumberKitty · Nov 15, 2022 at 03:54 PM

Urges. I can deal with them. They are just annoying me though.

SlumberKitty · Dec 08, 2022 at 02:25 PM

I'm going to try to stay self harm free until after my Peru trip in late April 23. Do you think I can do it? I'm at 51 days right now.

SlumberKitty · Dec 15, 2022 at 05:35 PM

Stupid relapse/lapse whatever it is. IDK. IDC

Bill3 · Dec 15, 2022 at 07:56 PM

((((((((SlumberKitty))))))))

willowtigger · Dec 16, 2022 at 10:15 AM

s Kit

SlumberKitty · Dec 29, 2022 at 05:42 PM

Having urges. Some of them kind of are bothering me but I am just trying to ignore them.

ReptileInYourHead · Dec 30, 2022 at 06:12 PM

Hey slumber, is there a pattern to when your urges arise? Are you aware of the triggers, is it just random sometimes?

SlumberKitty · Dec 30, 2022 at 06:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ReptileInYourHead

Hey slumber, is there a pattern to when your urges arise? Are you aware of the triggers, is it just random sometimes?

I'm not too sure what triggers it. It seems random but there might be some underlying pattern that neither I nor the therapists I have seen have figured out. I can be perfectly fine and then four hours later I'm in crisis and either self harming or having bad urges. It's weird how that happens. Sometimes when things are going too well that seems to be a trigger too. What is that like self-sabotage? IDK. It's tricky. I think right now the urges are related to my thoughts being unstable. What I mean by that is more paranoia, hearing things that aren't there etc. So I think the urges have popped up due to these other things going on. So maybe that's a trigger?! IDK.

SlumberKitty · Jan 16, 2023 at 01:21 PM

Having quite a few self harm urges. Sigh. I don't know. I probably won't act on them but I'm not 100% sure.

willowtigger · Jan 16, 2023 at 05:07 PM

brings jellybabies in if they will help distract Kit's urges

willowtigger · Jan 16, 2023 at 05:08 PM

what colour jellybabies is your favourite, Kit? I'll virtually provide that colour for you

SlumberKitty · Jan 16, 2023 at 05:10 PM

Thanks willowtigger. You're so sweet. I like the black licorice ones.

willowtigger · Jan 16, 2023 at 05:13 PM

brings the black ones in for Kit

SlumberKitty · Feb 09, 2023 at 05:32 PM

Having urges this week. Not sure if it is related to having a lot of anxiety/panic attacks. Or if it is something else. Sigh. I gotta make it six days to get to two months.

Bill3 · Feb 09, 2023 at 06:40 PM

Hang in there Kit!

willowtigger · Feb 09, 2023 at 06:55 PM

brings more black jellybabies in for Kit, so she can eat them instead of doing anything to herself

SlumberKitty · Feb 23, 2023 at 02:42 PM

Urges, urges, urges. They've been with me for days now. Sometimes they are emotional. Sometimes they are thoughts. I am finally getting kind of spaced out/dissociated though the thoughts persist. But they don't feel as much a part of me. I may still end up self harming. I don't know. Urges are upsetting. Wish I could completely dissociate so I could not have to experience this. It's only been 10 days since I self harmed. Who cares. Maybe I shouldn't even keep track.

SlumberKitty · Feb 27, 2023 at 05:25 PM

I self harmed yesterday. I wrapped it up in gauze yesterday and haven't undone the gauze yet to see how bad they are. I will have to do that tonight I suppose. They kind of hurt but that's to be expected I suppose. I wonder what my therapist is going to say on Wednesday. This should be interesting. I'm stressed about it but I am trying not to be.

Bill3 · Feb 27, 2023 at 06:13 PM

((((((((Kit)))))))))

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willowtigger Tigger and Willow meowmy willowtigger "yes i know i'm just an outcast, i shouldn't speak to you, still i see your face and wonder, were you once an outcast too"Esmerelda, HOND Member Since: Mar 2022 Location: UK Posts: 3,450 (SuperPoster!) 2,934 hugs given	Oct 22, 2022 at 03:31 PM #281 we all love a Kit __________________ "True courage is about knowing not when to take a life but when to spare one" Gandalf - The Hobbit "If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever" for my angel girl flying high The future will not remember, the past does not forget
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder SlumberKitty is staying stable. Member Since: Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,288 (SuperPoster!) 118.7k hugs given	Nov 15, 2022 at 03:54 PM #282 Urges. I can deal with them. They are just annoying me though. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder SlumberKitty is staying stable. Member Since: Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,288 (SuperPoster!) 118.7k hugs given	Dec 08, 2022 at 02:25 PM #283 I'm going to try to stay self harm free until after my Peru trip in late April 23. Do you think I can do it? I'm at 51 days right now. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder SlumberKitty is staying stable. Member Since: Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,288 (SuperPoster!) 118.7k hugs given	Dec 15, 2022 at 05:35 PM #284 Stupid relapse/lapse whatever it is. IDK. IDC __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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Bill3 Legendary Bill3 has no updates. Member Since: Mar 2009 Location: USA Posts: 10,835 (SuperPoster!) 23.9k hugs given	Dec 15, 2022 at 07:56 PM #285 ((((((((SlumberKitty))))))))
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willowtigger Tigger and Willow meowmy willowtigger "yes i know i'm just an outcast, i shouldn't speak to you, still i see your face and wonder, were you once an outcast too"Esmerelda, HOND Member Since: Mar 2022 Location: UK Posts: 3,450 (SuperPoster!) 2,934 hugs given	Dec 16, 2022 at 10:15 AM #286 s Kit __________________ "True courage is about knowing not when to take a life but when to spare one" Gandalf - The Hobbit "If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever" for my angel girl flying high The future will not remember, the past does not forget
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder SlumberKitty is staying stable. Member Since: Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,288 (SuperPoster!) 118.7k hugs given	Dec 29, 2022 at 05:42 PM #287 Having urges. Some of them kind of are bothering me but I am just trying to ignore them. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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ReptileInYourHead Veteran Member ReptileInYourHead isnt all together there Member Since: Jan 2017 Location: In the back of your mind Posts: 560 65 hugs given	Dec 30, 2022 at 06:12 PM #288 Hey slumber, is there a pattern to when your urges arise? Are you aware of the triggers, is it just random sometimes?
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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder SlumberKitty is staying stable. Member Since: Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,288 (SuperPoster!) 118.7k hugs given	Jan 16, 2023 at 01:21 PM #290 Having quite a few self harm urges. Sigh. I don't know. I probably won't act on them but I'm not 100% sure. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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willowtigger Tigger and Willow meowmy willowtigger "yes i know i'm just an outcast, i shouldn't speak to you, still i see your face and wonder, were you once an outcast too"Esmerelda, HOND Member Since: Mar 2022 Location: UK Posts: 3,450 (SuperPoster!) 2,934 hugs given	Jan 16, 2023 at 05:07 PM #291 brings jellybabies in if they will help distract Kit's urges __________________ "True courage is about knowing not when to take a life but when to spare one" Gandalf - The Hobbit "If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever" for my angel girl flying high The future will not remember, the past does not forget
	Reply With Quote

willowtigger Tigger and Willow meowmy willowtigger "yes i know i'm just an outcast, i shouldn't speak to you, still i see your face and wonder, were you once an outcast too"Esmerelda, HOND Member Since: Mar 2022 Location: UK Posts: 3,450 (SuperPoster!) 2,934 hugs given	Jan 16, 2023 at 05:08 PM #292 what colour jellybabies is your favourite, Kit? I'll virtually provide that colour for you __________________ "True courage is about knowing not when to take a life but when to spare one" Gandalf - The Hobbit "If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever" for my angel girl flying high The future will not remember, the past does not forget
	Reply With Quote

SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder SlumberKitty is staying stable. Member Since: Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,288 (SuperPoster!) 118.7k hugs given	Jan 16, 2023 at 05:10 PM #293 Thanks willowtigger. You're so sweet. I like the black licorice ones. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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willowtigger Tigger and Willow meowmy willowtigger "yes i know i'm just an outcast, i shouldn't speak to you, still i see your face and wonder, were you once an outcast too"Esmerelda, HOND Member Since: Mar 2022 Location: UK Posts: 3,450 (SuperPoster!) 2,934 hugs given	Jan 16, 2023 at 05:13 PM #294 brings the black ones in for Kit __________________ "True courage is about knowing not when to take a life but when to spare one" Gandalf - The Hobbit "If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever" for my angel girl flying high The future will not remember, the past does not forget
	Reply With Quote

SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder SlumberKitty is staying stable. Member Since: Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,288 (SuperPoster!) 118.7k hugs given	Feb 09, 2023 at 05:32 PM #295 Having urges this week. Not sure if it is related to having a lot of anxiety/panic attacks. Or if it is something else. Sigh. I gotta make it six days to get to two months. __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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Bill3 Legendary Bill3 has no updates. Member Since: Mar 2009 Location: USA Posts: 10,835 (SuperPoster!) 23.9k hugs given	Feb 09, 2023 at 06:40 PM #296 Hang in there Kit!
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willowtigger Tigger and Willow meowmy willowtigger "yes i know i'm just an outcast, i shouldn't speak to you, still i see your face and wonder, were you once an outcast too"Esmerelda, HOND Member Since: Mar 2022 Location: UK Posts: 3,450 (SuperPoster!) 2,934 hugs given	Feb 09, 2023 at 06:55 PM #297 brings more black jellybabies in for Kit, so she can eat them instead of doing anything to herself __________________ "True courage is about knowing not when to take a life but when to spare one" Gandalf - The Hobbit "If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever" for my angel girl flying high The future will not remember, the past does not forget
	Reply With Quote

Bill3 Legendary Bill3 has no updates. Member Since: Mar 2009 Location: USA Posts: 10,835 (SuperPoster!) 23.9k hugs given	Feb 27, 2023 at 06:13 PM #300 ((((((((Kit)))))))))
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