Should

Maybe I ''Should'' be doing something more productive with my time. A doctor told me I am ''pissing away my life''.... She was someone I liked, not a doctor irl and not anyone on pc. (she didn't actually know me... not many do...) that's not the worst thing I was told. At least that implied I am ''capable'' of change

Why am I so ''weak''.... that I sometimes ''let'' mean, ill thought out words bother me

I do not feel like being kind to the bear.

I feel like

A psychiatrist who was treating me in the hospital years ago told me I had allowed depression to ruin my entire life. She wanted me to have ECT. She really didn't know me at all. But she was right about me having ruined my entire life (as well as others along with me.) She just didn't know there was a lot more to it than ECT could fix.

(Please don't hurt the bear...)

Grrrrrrr. I'm sorry she said that. They can be so brutal with their words sometimes. (Who ''wants'' to be depressed )

(and I haven't found they want to listen to what is behind the ''presenting symptom(s)'' either ) (or they dig with a hatchet and then invalidate )

HUGS Fuzzy

Fuzzybear, I can wholeheartedly relate to what you are saying, and I'm sorry that you are feeling this way. It often feels like the things that will provide us with immediate release to feel better are the things that hurt us the most. So, I don't think that you are weak. I think that any habit is hard to break, especially while trying to form new habits. And, I think an element of that is what you are already doing - acknowledging that there are moments when it's harder to exercise new, healthy habits as opposed to our old, maladaptive ones. I can empathize with feeling weak, but from my perspective, I see you as strong for recognizing what it is that you want to do but make a different choice instead

No one has the right to define who they think you are. You get to decide who you are! xo Of course mean words bother you. We are all human and are hurt by hateful words.