[byfnvy]

I had my APE today, and I think for the first time ever, the doctor asked about my scars. I've been working for over ten years, and this is the first time it's come up, and I guess it will show up on my records.

My boss actually saw my scars for the first time a few days ago. He saw them right away when I was in his office, my jacket sleeve was a bit rolled up. He was surprised, but didn't make a big deal out of it. I just told him it was from college and lied about not doing it anymore. I haven't done it since coming back to the office this April. I also told the doctor I wasn't doing it anymore, I guess I was kind of taken by surprise and didn't really think about what to answer, even though I saw her notice when she took my blood pressure. I don't know if it's obvious that some of those were fairly recent. She didn't take a closer look.

I also said no when she asked about depression, anxiety and suicide ideation. I've had them to some degree, but I've never been diagnosed or anything. I did say I still get urges sometimes when I'm stressed. I just nodded when she gave me advice about getting help for it, which I don't think I will.

[Yaowen]

I hope your physician is kind-hearted and understanding!